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Does Thanksgiving Have to be Today?

In today's world of 50% of Marriages ending in divorce the question comes to my mind is this: Does Thanksgiving have to be today?

When I was growing up in Miami my parents celebrated Thanksgiving every year with our entire family and friends. This would mean my Mother would cook for 35-50 people every year. Looking back I have to say these are some of the best memories for me. Now many years later I am a Father and I am one of the divorce statics and have to split our holidays back and forth with my son's mother. Sadly my sister is as well in the same boat with her family.

This year was not my sisters time to have her children for Thanksgiving but it was my turn. (how sad is this) We decided that since we could not all be together on Thanksgiving (Thursday) why can't we just move the day back one to Wednesday. After all isn't Thanksgiving a day to be with your family? So really what is in a day?

So beginning this year I think we may have started a new tradition in having our Thanksgiving on Wednesday night.

Last night was a wonderful night with the Grandparents , Aunts, Uncles and of course the what makes Thanksgiving so special our the Children.

I wish you and your family a Happy Thanksgiving.

Posted Thursday Nov 22

Happy Thanksgiving Matt!

It has nothing to do about the 'day'.

It has to do with the celebration and family.

Have a good one, Matt!

Neal, Thank you I hope you have a great Thanksgiving as well

Tom, Thank you I hope you have the same.

Matthew, this is a tough one for your family. I would do just like you recommend. Make a different and go all out. Enjoy your family.

(11/22/07 08:26AM) — Sarah Cooper

Happy Thanksgiving, Matt!  It's not about the date, which you already know.  :o)  Enjoy the holiday!

Frank, Thank you. I wish you and your family a happy Thanksgiving

Sarah, I agree.:-) Have  a Happy Thanksgiving:-)

What a great idea, Matthew and now your kids can stay connected with all their cousins. That is important.

Excellent solution!  It's not about a particular day and shouldn't only be kept to that single day.  Anyway, it's partially a made up holiday in that it's not celebrated on a particular date, just the 4th thursday in November.  Glad you enjoyed yours!

Missy, I agree I believe it is important that the cousins stay close. Thanks and have a Happy Thanksgiving

Marc, Thank you. I really did. Now my son and I will have a nice quiet day in front of the TV watching Football..:-)Hope you have a great Thanksgiving

(11/22/07 10:23AM) — Thomas Weiss

Matt,

Again Happy Thanksgiving to You, and I hope it's wonderful for you.

Tom Weiss

Tom, Thank you and to you and your family may you have a great Thanksgiving

That's a great solution.  It isn't all about one particular "day", it's the meaning behind it.  My family and I usually spread out a holiday over several days, in order to spend time with everyone special to us.

Jeannie, Thank you I agree. Your way is a great way as well. Thanks for your comment.

Matthew, I just thought I'd drop in to see what was going on today (since I'm an addict).  Happy Thankgsgiving to you.

Blended families make the Holiday's a bit cumbersome. It sounds like you have a good plan. 

Happy Thanksgiving to you Matt!  We used to celebrate on Tuesdays because it was my mom's day off from work. Today she is sick and we changed to my house for just the kids and us. That's okay....a day spent blogging :) 

Matthew ~  I am very sorry that you have experienced this kind of "loss", and yet I am very proud of you for finding strength in making a tradition be so special for your son.  May you always have the bestest Thanksgiving Eve Dinners!

Dan, Thats ok..so am I..why do you think I posted today?..lol thank you

Sally, lol..Thank you. Hopefully your mom will get better real soon

Sarah, Thank you.

Matt.... Tom Burris hit the nail on the head....   Sorry for the situation, because I would hate to see anyone go through it.  But glad that you all were able to get together with the kids and that you all enjoyed each other...   Family & support....  not everyone has it, so we need to be thankful. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.

 

Jeff, Thank you. I wish you and your family a Happy Thanksgiving

Matt,

I have been through this, it is rough. Happy Thanksgiving...email...

Karen, Thank you and thank you for your E-mail. It means a lot.

You are welcome, and I mean it... :-)

Matt,

What a nice idea...family gatherings are so important to children...They develop values from what we share with them...important things...family! TTUS, K

Matt,

Thanks for this great post!

Karen, Thanks. I agree the family is so important for children

Matt, sounds like you found a good solution and a new tradition. We were affected by much the same as Grandchildren only had a few hour to visit with us because of divorce. Thanfully they are returning this evening and we can spend the week end together. Hope you had fun.

Keith & Robin, Thank you. I think this is the best way after all I don't think it is about the day but about the family being together.  Hope you have a great weekend

Matt Good For You!

Steve and I meet friends like us that have no family in the area, we all bring a dish and eat together like a family then I cook our turkey on the weekend. (Just so I can make soup for the chilly Dec weekend that is bound to show up at some point). I hope you had a great time!

Lysa,Thats great that you have such a group.:-) as far as the Turkey goes.. Yesterday since it was only my son and myself we had meatloaf..:-)

Matthew ~  You are welcome!  What did you end up doing then for Thanksgiving proper??  It is my hope that you were able to relax and enjoy a quiet day!  :)

Matthew,

You are cracking me up - meatloaf...reminds me of the dad and son walking through the grocery store and the little kid pulls on the meat managers coat and says, can you show my dad what goes in a meatloaf!!!

I had turkey...a little...I was craving one of those deep fried turkeys....After cooking for 2 days straight, I was almost to tired to eat!!!

Want to send your meatloaf recipe to my AR cook book group???That is if it's an original...LOL

I can see this story in a few years, yea, dad made me meatloaf...as the story goes, as a pilgrim, he chased the cow, hung it, butchered, it...chopped in fine and added all these wonderful other plants (from the garden) to it...LMAO!

I'm teasing you of course...

Sarah, It was a great day. Watched Football with my son and made him a Meatloaf and potato's..(truth be told I don't like turkey)

Karen, lol... I made it with the Tri-Meats..:-) not sure it is worthy of your recipe..but it was good and my son liked it..Glad I made you smile.

Oh, the "TRI" MEATS!!! lol, That mean's you aren't sure what animals...then again...I'm really laughing now... I try to use the Tri-meats when I make meat loaf as well...LOLOL

This is a GREAT IDEA!!  It is about being with family...and being together!  I'm glad to hear you have a remedy!!  I hope you enjoyed your day...as well as the day before!!  :-) 

Karen, See...:-P

Susie, We really did. Thank you

Matt,

Send it anyway, it's a test! Let's see what you added to the TRI! Then I'll post MY meatloaf recipe for you!

;-)

yang-yang...that's my graphic, that made me laugh too!

I am one of the lucky divorced, though for my kids sake I wish the X wasn't such a empty space in their lives.  I am really the only parent now in my kids lives,  for all holidays, never do I have to worry about it not being my turn.  Everything is my turn.  When he left he started his life anew.   My kids say they are fine with it, that they wouldn't want to have anything to do with them anyway, but I am sure there is more hurt there than they want to let on.  We have come together as a stonger and happier family and our Holidays are full of love, extended family and good times.  It is sad though that they have lost out on having a father in their lives.  

Beth,

My ex-husband was so verbally abusive to me...as a physician he actually came to my house with a loaded gun when my kids were very young...crazy...

Because he made a lot more money than I did when they were young...gift's were them.

Now at the ripe old age of 63, he is infatuated with some 25 yo stripper...gives her money and whatever...

My oldest daughter turned 26, she told him that he was a fool...she just wanted the money...oh, and did I fail to mention, he met her on a porno site that he forgot to close out...sick, really sick

Because of all of this discusting behavior...they now, know...I was right...it just took time for them to grow up and see it in "their own eye's"  tough Love!

I know it's tough for you...hang in there, the rewards are there for your future!

(((huggs!)))

Karen, I wil think about that.. I am not sure if is that great.. it was just a few things..:-)

Beth, I really don't get that at all. I am sorry.  I know when my ex and I split it was our son that was the most important thing in both of our lives.  I don't understand how people can just walk away like that

Karen, Wow!  what can I say to that?  That had to be very tough on you

Karen, sometimes divorce is the best thing that can happen, getting away from someone that doesn't bring anything positive to the home.  Your X sounds like a nightmare.  Mine bought a bar a few years before he left, worked long, long hours and of course I felt guilty if I complained and wanted him to spend more time at home, after all he was doing it for us.  He came home one night early, which seemed like a good thing, until the kids went to bed and he set down and told me he was leaving, he had fallen in love with a barmaid at work and in a few months they would be having a baby.  Talk about the earth turning upside down, the next day he was living in her apt with her daugther and son and that was that.   He made an attempt at the beginning to come by and see the kids, they refused to go anywhere with him if the girlfiend was around and that made it hard for him and he pretty quickly stopped making an effort.  Now its a call or email here and there and maybe he sees them once a year.   But you are right about the rewards, I didn't even realise how unhappy I was in the marriage until a year or so after he left and the hurt and confusion were past with only a calm and peacefulness of having my life back in my own hands, no longer worried all the time about why he was moody and keeping the kids out of his hair because his temper was so short with them.  We are all much happier now and my kids mention it often.  He actually tried to come back after many months away, saying he made a mistake and he wasn't happy with her, told me he always loved me, he was just confused, that was when I knew I was healed.  I told him I was sorry that he was unhappy but I couldn't help and I sent him back to her.  No regrets.

Matt~ I don't get it either, they are wonderful loving children (though not children anymore but young adults)  I would have fought tooth and nail, if the shoe had been on the other foot, to keep them part of my life.  My X was always an emotionally distant person and though I know he does love his kids, his level of loving isn't deep enough to make him work at it.  At the beginning I wasn't helpful in pushing them to be with him and the girlfriend, I was too hurt and torn up myself to be the peacemaker for him.  I never tried to keep them apart though and always encouraged him to make plans to see them, but he just seldom followed through and the kids stopped expecting anything from him.   It's strange, but his father also had a family that he left behind when he married my X's mother.  There was a daughter and a son from a first marriage that I never even knew existed until my father-in-law died and the daughter came to the funeral, the son did not come as he had disowned his father for never being a part of their lives after he walked out on their mother.  History repeats itself.

Matt,

I struck a nerve on one of my latest posts....you may have a mortgage opinion....

Beth, WOW! I think you are right.. funny how history repeats itself. I know when I was a kid the most important thing to my father was getting home to watch my baseball or basketball games and be with his family.  Funny that is the most important thing to me

Karen, Which post?

Matt - seems like you struck a cord with PLENTY on AR!  You may have also helped them figure out how to make it all work for everyone!  GOOD JOB SIR!!

PS...You're on a roll...keep it up!  :-)  Congrats!

Matthew- I am so g;ad that you made a new day for the kids. Katerina

Matt,

This one,,,,

POSITIVITY AGAIN....SO GET OVER IT!

Then there is my, What's new pussy cat???? Woooooo............... ....

......OK, an email if I went overboard...OK...  ;-)

Susie, Thank you...I appreciate that

Katerina, I just think the kids won't remember what day we ate dinner but what I think they will remember that we where together..:-)

Karen,  I did not see the pussy cat one.... A little Tom Jones?

Matt,

Just double click on my link above your previous post...no not TJ....lolol!!!

Karen, What is wrong with Tom Jones. When I was a kid he was the Man!...

Matt,

Nothing's wrong with him, LOL, same here...dating ourselves remembering him...huh?  LOL

 

Karen, I remeber the woman throwing their panties up on stage... and I kept thinking one day I want to be him,,:-)

Karen,  :-)... <wink>

Karen, I just can't sing....lol

Karen, Ok I can in the shower when knowone is around..lol

Matt,

Now come on here...LOLOL...

Karen, ok ok.. I would also need a lot of Johnnie Walker..:-)

Karen,, One Thing I am not cheap....lol Blue baby... ok I only drink that on a closing..lol Black.

I see, I see, me either. My last closing I bought my buyers a bottle of Dom Perignon. They have everything else!

 

Karen, Very nice...

Matt,

Thanks! Which is stirring my mind for another blog...

Matt,

I just had to do it...I wrote a blog about gifts as closing. Thanks for stirring my mind into another blog. All because you could "sing in the shower"..LMAOROF!!!!

Karen, I read it.. Thanks for the mention

Matt,

No problem, thank's for stimulating my mind...it's on overdrive...a few more...

Karen, Glad I can stimulate you..:-) <wink>

Matt,

If you show up on here with a Santa Clause hat or Christmas lights all over your head, I will never speak to you again...LOL!

Karen, No worries maybe Hanukkah Harry..lol

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