Friction between buyers, sellers may mean market is changing

2005: Sellers win big

2007-08: Friction

2009: Buyers win big.

2010: Friction

Yes, the sparks are starting to fly between buyers and sellers again and I suspect this means that the real estate market may be poised to segue into a more normal equilibrium.

Sometimes, it's hard to remember what "normal" means. Here's my view:

• Buyers choose a house based on it meeting their emotional and physical needs.

• Buyers look within their price range, not $50,000 to $100,000 above it thinking that the seller will serve up any equity they might have on a silver platter.

• Buyers listen to their Realtors regarding list-to-sale percentages, sales of comparable properties and how to craft an offer.

• Sellers actually counter an offer, without fear and loathing.

• Occasionally, sellers of regular homes (not short sales or foreclosures) get competing offers.

• Days on market figures return to tolerable levels; list-to-sale percentages remain at a steadier 97%; appreciation - no matter how small - makes a comeback.

But the struggle to get to "normal' usually comes with an uncomfortable convulsion in the marketplace. Purchase agreements are more like an arm wrestling matches than negotiations.

And you know what happens when the sparks fly: People get burned. In the last two weeks I've seen:

• A couple of disappointed buyers lose houses they wanted because they either didn't act quickly enough or believed the price was out of line;

• An incensed seller ready to walk on the contract after an excessive repair request from a buyer who won the house in a bid war;

• A Realtor shouts at another Realtor.

The good news is that the same friction happened as we headed into the Great Sellers' Market, then into the Great Buyers' Market. Maybe this friction portends a return to normal.

And wouldn't we be happy with normal? Can I get an Amen?