The calendar on the wall tells me that it is December 27th, so that can only mean one thing. Actually, that can mean many things, but let's focus on the agenda at hand.
It's resolution time.
I have already laid out a paradigm shift that I will employ in my personal life for the coming year, and now it is time to address the additional goals and changes that are in store for yours truly.
"I'll take Scottsdale Real Estate for 1000, Ray!"
With my goals clearly defined for the coming year, it is truly going to be one for the books. Best of luck to everyone in 2008, in both your personal and professional lives. Scott Baio, Ralph Macchio, Corey Haim and I look forward to seeing you at my open houses!
Paul Slaybaugh with Realty Executives is your source for Scottsdale AZ Real Estate. While Paul (thankfully) has absolutely no association with the above "celebrities," he does know how to sell houses. It's been a family tradition since 1974. For all of your Scottsdale, Phoenix and Paradise Valley AZ Real Estate needs, call Paul today at (480) 948-9450 or send him an email at paul@rayandpaul.com.
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Scottsdale, Phoenix and Paradise Valley AZ Real Estate. A Slaybaugh family tradition since 1974! We haven't sold every home in the Valley, but we're working on it!
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Paul- LOL, I am still laughing! I love your Hari Krishna idea! That is a much better use of your money than wasting it on print advertising! I just wish all the other agents would get a clue or better yet, educate the sellers that it is just a For Me thing going on. Katerina
Now Paul...it's time for me to go to sleep and I've laughed so hard at this it woke me up. You are just too funny. I think I'm going to put your wife on the very top of my prayer list...she needs it with you and those 2 adorable little ones who I'm sure are just like you! LOL
My wife doesn't think you are as funny as I do. I am sitting here LMAO at the "I will not fall for the banana in the tailpipe" line and she is looking at me like I am crazy. She's a little young for classic Eddie Murphy I guess. In fact, she just saw Trading Places for the first time the other night..........Axel Foley, you are FUNNY!!!
Love your late night musings, hilarious! Next time I have buyers with a sense of humor I'll have to try the Darth Vader trick.
We're all counting on you to put the Baha Men to rest! Thanks in advance!
You got Issac to serve mimosas??? Damn... the best I could do was Tootie from the Facts of Life and she ain't servin no mimosas.
If Ted "Isaac" Lange is there, I am there. You are a funny dude, my friend. By the way, please don't tell anyone, but I let the dogs out. There. I said it. Yep. I let 'em out. Also, you may find the following to be helpful:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spleen
Please don't pull a Chevy Chase and get addicted to painkillers after your crazy pratfalls.
Here is another consideration for your inspector theme:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=iKeE3saeguY
Paul ~ Thanks! You started my mornng off right! Love the pratfall idea (as well as your other resolutions)!
Paul, that's quite a list. I hadn't thought about it, but now I'll have to add a human organ to my list too.
Paul - What are you doing posting? Go get that dry cleaning already!
Paul, Too freakin' funny. Love your shaving your head to be a Hare Krishna and just totally lost it on 'will not fall for the banana in the tailpipe.'
I'm always happy to make you laugh, Katerina. Newspaper advertising is a joke. It's a great way to impress a seller without accomplishing anything. No kidding, I ran a beautiful full color ad for 6 months this past year which featured a rotation of my listings. The netresult? Drumroll please ... 1 phone call! Smart marketing trumps wasteful marketing every day of the week.
I'm laughing my ass off! What a terrific way to begin my Friday :)
Hi, Linda. I don't know how my wife puts up with me, to be honest with you. In fact, I don't know how I put up with you is one of her favorite expressions. She does not think I am nearly as funny as I do ;)
Hi, Lisa. There is good news, and there is bad news. The bad news is that no one has seen The Baha Men since 2005. The good news is no one has seen The Baha Men since 2005.
Hey, Bob. I have the same problem with my wife. She's a few years younger, so many of my random references go completely over her head. Of course, as I mentioned to Lisa, she doesn't think too much of the ones she gets anyway. Tough crowd, these wives of ours!
Hi, Jesse and Kathy. Well if you get Tootie, I'm calling dibs on Blaire.
Jason, I knew you let the dogs out. I just knew it. I was hoping you would be man enough to admit it. Now if you could please round them up and return them at once, perhaps The Baha Men will be able to get on with their lives ... performing on the Chuck E Cheese novelty act circuit.
Your Inspector Gadget link was priceless, by the way.
You're right, Adam. I stand corrected. I will refer to Scott Baio as a C-Section list celebrity from this day hence.
Kathy, I'm happy to oblige! Nothing like a chuckle to start the day, is there?
Peggy, there are still plenty of good ones from which to choose. Why don't you study up on the pancreas this year, and we'll compare notes next December. Deal?
Sandra: Alas, I am pretty sure that ship has sailed. I wouldn't be surprised to see my shirts walking around on someone else right now. For the pure comedic opportunity to walk into the cleaners and present a 2 year old ticket with no trace of irony, however, I just might have to do it.
Andrew, once I am finished with my full review of the spleen, I will let you know if what you suggest is physically possible.
Hi Marc. Another Eddie Murphy fan, I love it! All these years later, that one little line still cracks me up. Before he became safe and family friendly, Eddie was one of the best ever.
Ah, my job is done then, Jennifer! Have a great Friday.
Paul, Buscemi is kinda ticked off that he wasn't invited to the open house and is now planning a coup to knock out Scott Baio.
Paul, You can send me the pens, fridge magnets, and bagels with cream cheese. Otherwise I'd have nothing to write with, decorate my kitchen with, and I'll have to go hungry. By the way, what will be your theme music when you hold open houses? Audio daily double please...
Paul, I bookmarked this post so that I can come back and read it when I need a laugh. You are very good, my friend. So funny! That first point...I read it and then read it again and Aha LOL! Thanks for starting my day out with a good hearty laugh! Happy New Year and I hope 2008 is a great year for you in all ways!
Paul, can I get a ticket to this circus? I can't even think, I'm laughing so hard! Hey, Buscemi, where you going with that banana?
Paul, nice list. I need to start making mine. But first, I have to respond to all these wonderful people that subscribe to my BLOG.
YOU ARE TOOOOOO HYSTERICAL! I LAUGHED UNTIL I CRIED. THANKS!!!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I was considering the theme to Jaws, but I am SOOOOOO working the Darth Vader action for inspections. It's perfect.
One question though, won't Tina Yothers be jealous if you have Blair at the Open Houses? I'm just sayin'....
Ha ha ha-my gut hurts. :::deep breath::: A Triple Lindy? Now that's a thought. Have a Happy New Year!
PAUL: This is side-splitting funny!!! How do you come up with this stuff? I wanna be funny. I wanna be funny. ::CLICKING HEELS:: I wanna be funny!!! Nope...still not funny!
Paul - Plagiarist! That's just what I was going to write!!! Some of your best, bud... keep it up.
Paul - Thanks for the morning laughs! This is Great!
I could use a Mimosa this morning from Issac the bartender! Where is he anyway?
Paul, you are so going to disappoint all those check list totin' buckethead inspectors if you return their marketing gifts. You could at least eat the donuts or bagels? they bring you.
And donate all those pens and apppointment books to the homeless shelter. Those guys could use some help remembering where they need to be at what time to get the biggest donations.
And, if you show them you don't want the junk, what are they going to spend their money on.
As for the Darth Vader Theme Here's a couple of choices.
FULL VERSION
30 SECOND CLIP
And I agree, You need to seek proof that your dad is NOT Alex Trebek!
Funny Stuff. Guess I need to get to work on my resolutions.
Lisa: Do NOT give Buscemi directions to my office!
Brian: My theme? Same as always, Eye of the Tiger.
Jeanean: Glad I could accomodate you with the laugh. I hope your 2008 is equally excellent!
Elaine: You know the ferris wheel always has room for one more!
Danny: Solid idea.
Deb: Glad to hear I struck your funny bone! I got your email by the way, and will keep your son's info should I ever need a backup lender. You're a good mom. Best wishes for 2008.
Amanda: Tina Yothers is not welcome at my open houses. Have you seen that tangled mess of blond hair? How am I supposed to keep my client's house in order with her shedding all over the sofa?
Julie: Happy 2008 to you! Once you regain composure, I'm sure it will be a highly productive year!
Elizabeth: Who knows where this stuff comes from? Both of my folks disavow any possibility that it comes from their respective sides of the family tree. Best wishes for 2008!
Tom: Sorry if I stole your thunder, but I'd still love to see your list of resolutions if that indeed is what you were putting together.
James: I haven't seen Isaac this morning. He was up pretty late with Captain Stubing at the casino last night.
Erby: The Buckingham Palace Marching Band playing The Imperial March? Timestamp this at 10:45 AM (MST) on 10/29/2007. I have now officially seen everything!
Paul - You have the best sense of humor man....awesome list. Make it a great 2008!
Not being a big resolution maker, I almost skipped over this one! Glad I didn't, it was your usual hilarious stuff! Thanks for the chuckle!
Thank you kindly, Bill! What's life without laughter? I hope 2008 is a banner year for you as well.
That's funny, Kelly. I've never been one to make resolutions either. Too easy to just muck them up knowing that you can try again next year. If I am going to make a change, I make a change. I don't resolve. Thanks for sharing a laugh with me over this very irreverent resolution list.
Paul, You always make me laugh. One of my resolutions was not to blog as much, except when I need a chuckle or two. Thanks
This hilarious! I just might have to play some music for the home inspector. That is too funny.
Hi, Judy. If you are looking to limit your blogging time on AR, I will make it my mission in life to ensure you have something to laugh about while you are around. Best wishes for 2008!
Glad you enjoyed it, Melina. Let me know how the musical accompaniment for the inspector goes!