Barbara Tretola

One sultry summer night, it was warm enough for an open window with a fan, but not so warm for use of air conditioning. I laid there enjoying the sound of the crickets and was just about to drifting off to sleep, when a very unpleasant smell wafted in thru my windows and jolted me fully awake. The smell was so overwhelming there was no sleeping for me anytime soon until it thoroughly dissipated. I knew what it was immediately but there was nothing I could do about it.

The summer had been so pleasant at night there was no need to put my air conditioning unit in yet and it was not something I was going to do about it at that hour.Sleep alluded me most of that night. So in order to avoid this nightly assault I will be forced to give up the peaceful lull of the crickets and listen to the drone of an air conditioner at night. Not only an annoying thing, but also a costly adjustment on my part, but needed to get a restful night's sleep.

The smell was from my neighbor's cigarette and her husband's very strong and smelly cigar. Their air conditioning was humming, so apparently they had stepped out on their balcony to smoke instead of smoking up their own home. How considerate of them, NOT. Their back yard borders on my side yard, and it is a considerable distance, but the smoke does travel.

This is a theme that seems to be universal. I read about it on real estate boards where owners are bothered by smokers on their baloneys. I read it on cruise discussion boards where people in balcony cabins have to keep their sliding doors closed to keep the smoke out from the adjacent cabins. And of course from workers when they have to walk passed the cloud of smoke from their colleagues who are huddled outside. So then there are arguments about smoker's rights vs non smokers rights. But really who has the right to the air? When I indulge in my own vices, they never impinge on anyone else's air, aura or rights in general. so the question is, I own the property and what I do on it is private, but who owns the air?

Why is it that some homeowners say they want their home sold, but then go out of their way to work against you? At first you haggle over the listing price and say, let's try this price for awhile. Since the price is not horribly off, you agree, well we will see and after a month is up, we will need to reduce the pricing if we get no showings. This is agreed on. We also mention, it is important the home be as accessible as possible.You take the listing in spite of misgivings because it is a well maintained beautiful home and you know it will sell eventually.

So we market the home and set up the open house, and this was also a hassle. Excuses are:" Well this weekend we are having company, next weekend is ok, but 3 hours is too long, and it needs to be earlier in the day and shorter." The open house comes and goes, too few buyers because of the timing in the day, not one bit of interest, all comments wind up being, nice home, too high. We pass this along only to hear, well it is too early and they do not know what they are talking about.

The month passes, and only one showing and agent showing it had to jump the hoops to get in. Grandma is home alone and gets scared, we can only show it when someone is with her. Again feedback is, nice home, too high. Mind you a home you listed at the same time has already had 2 dozen showings and 2 offers. And this is a home in need of major work, but reasonable sellers. Now we go back armed with all sorts of regional data showing how prices are still dropping we need to be in line with the trend.

We mention a NEW home in the area is the same price and older homes can not compete.You hear excuses like well the local newspaper says prices are not falling, and our home has xxx features, and oh by the way why aren't you bringing any buyers, only one person has come.

We show financial news and reports.

Mortgage Bankers Association: 2011 "The housing market may not stabilize until the first quarter of 2011." Business Week: 2012 - "With any luck, three years should be long enough for the U.S. economy to recover and for the nation's housing inventory to shrink to more normal levels." FHFA Price Decline Study: 2010 - "Indexes suggest that the time from peak to bottom tends to be about 3¾ years, whereas the median recovery period (from bottom to prior peak) was 6? years." Case Schiller Future Price Index (as of 6/09): May 2010

And then come the questions and comments: Did you put up signs directional showing the way to the house?(???????? even a new agent knows to do this.)Why don't we get any feedback. (Every feedback that has come back negative is ignored or refuted.) You of course can not be doing a good job, people should be flocking to this home. In response, you bring up other home listed at the same time, that was marketed the same way with different results (now in contract), but you hear, well it is a different area, you can not compare. We think it is too soon to drop the price we will wait another 2 months.

Two months pass, 3 showings, one a repeat. Get feedback from showing agents (when they actually return you calls or emails).Wonderful home, to high because it needs updating. You ask us to ask the agent to ask the buyer to justify their comments. (Hmm they saw a house down the street for less, just as nice and more updated.)

We even go so far as making a buyer survey asking each buyer that comes thru the door about condition and price, all say the same. Too much money, lovely house, but overpriced. Now you want know to why they said this and maybe we should call them and make them justify the comments.

We send them more data, local reports, newly solds and listed on MLS, and no response.

Money Magazine told their readers on 6/30/09: "To sell your home fast, you're going to have to dip 10% to 15% below what comparable homes in your neighborhood recently sold for. You still may not be able to compete with foreclosures and short sales, but at least you stand a chance of getting buyers to notice your listing." Talk to your agent about your price today!

Are you really sure you want to sell this house? If you are then you need to know:

Agents do not control the Market, Buyers do.

You are competing with other sellers.

Home must be easily accessible.

Listen to your agent.

Don't be stubborn about the price, or your house may sit for months and months with no offers. The longer it sits on the market, the staler it becomes.

You want to sell your home in a buyers' market? Then listen to the price your agent suggests, even if you think it should be higher.

Here is an article we all need to read, our health is an important aspect of our job:

Watch Your Waistline -- 5 Tips for Eating Out This Father's Day - By Sean Barker, CPT Think twice about heading to the "all you can eat" buffet this Father's Day as you may be putting your waistline at risk! Follow these 5 simple tips to eating healthy while enjoying Dad's day out. 1. Never go to a restaurant starving! You are setting yourself up for failure right from the start. Have a quick snack before you go if at all possible. A piece of fruit, some mixed nuts, or a protein shake will help satisfy you without filling you up so you can enjoy your meal. If you are really stuck, just grab a bottle of water on the way and drink it before you arrive. This alone will help you avoid ordering the entire menu. If your family is taking you to your favorite spot that you are familiar with and you are really hungry and in a rush, avoid looking at the menu altogether and tell the waiter what you want as soon as they come to your table. This way you won't cave in to all the gut-busting choices on the menu while you try to ignore your growling stomach. 2. Once you arrive and sit down at your table, skip the bread and alcohol. There is a reason they serve you this before your meal. It's because it has been proven in studies that bread and alcohol stimulate your appetite. The biological reason behind this is your body needs food to absorb the alcohol so you don't get alcohol poisoning. But if you're anything like me -- you still enjoy an ice cold beer or a vintage wine -- and you really want a drink, stick to one glass of wine or one light beer without the bread and have it in place of an appetizer. 3. When looking at the menu, remember that you don't have to order something exactly as it's shown. This is your day, and you (or hopefully your family) are paying for the food, so don't be afraid to ask for certain dishes with or without certain ingredients. Even if you do opt for the carb-laden pasta, ask for whole wheat pasta to sneak in a little extra fiber and avoid the blood sugar crash of refined flour. Always remember to ask how large the serving sizes are because most times the "single" portions these days are enough for two or more! 4. You don't have to be a nutritionist to know you should stay away from the obvious food choices that are breaded, battered, or deep fried. Trans-fats are not the new villains in this summer's new "Transformers" movie; they are deadly lab-created forms of fats that are foreign to your body's natural chemistry and wreck havoc on our hearts and our health. Also be wary of any dishes smothered and baked in creamy sauces. Just remember to ask how the dish is prepared. 5. Go for any lean protein source such as beef, chicken, pork, or fish. Nothing beats lean cuts of muscle-building meat seared over a hot flame. Pair it with any side dish like a green salad or fresh grilled veggies. Think protein and fats for your meal and avoid the processed carbs unless you are running a marathon the next day. Take the time to relax and eat slow, have some good conversation with others, and learn to enjoy the whole dining out experience instead of just focusing on filling your gut. And if it's a special occasion like Father's Day and you do want to treat yourself, go ahead and enjoy it and get back to your healthy habits the very next meal... ...because the stress from "food guilt" just might be worse than the food itself. About the Author: Sean Barker is a busy dad who finds time for family, fun, and fitness. He works as a heavy equipment operator working long 12-hour shifts of dayshifts AND nightshifts, up to 84 hours a week. He is ALSO a nationally certified personal trainer who runs his own fitness business and has a passion for helping others. But more importantly, Sean is a proud father and loving husband. Visit http://www.dadfitness.com Sean, a busy dad fitness expert, is giving away a cool new workout program that can be done at home. Get your FREE workout here. Check out the Experts page for Sean Barker, the SelfGrowth.com Official Guide to Fitness and Exercise.

If you have a question on our website, our newsletters, or virtually anything at all, please contact us at either expert@selfgrowth.com or at 732-617-1030. Or contact us at: Self Improvement Online, Inc. 200 Campus Drive, Suite D Morganville, NJ 07751

It amazes me how many people buying homes know "someone in the business" or family members who know a little about everything, who they drag along to see a house with them. These are people who think they know everything about buying selling and or conditions of homes. in most cases it only makes things worse.

For instance we took a friend of a friend out to look for a home for a very long time. When they found a home they like they brought in their "pit bull" to look over and criticize the homes ( a ploy to overshadow the fact that they grossly underbid on every house). While this man had some knowledge he was no home inspector and talked them out of homes that sold within days of their seeing it, and of course for a much higher price than they were offering. After awhile of this they stopped bringing him, but by that time, I no longer wanted to waste my time with them as clients.

Next case, a friend of my partner was looking for a home and wanted something near and similar to their parents' home. All seemed innocent in the beginning, but when the parents came along, all we heard was how much better THEIR HOME WAS. After some time they find a house around the corner form the parents, same style, just needed a little updating, but the price was good for the condition. They made an offer, it was accepted and then came the inspection ( by the most stringent inspector we know). Inspector finds NOTHING wrong, but he father then chimes in with it will take XXX dollars to bring it up to the quality of his home, and said they could not afford it. So the deal was nixed, and then again at that point we stopped showing them homes.

Last case was this week, new buyer finds a house they love (well at least the woman does). Fiance drags uncles along to inspection. Uncles pour over the house even before inspector gets going. 1/2 hour later they announce house is falling apart from water damage, information not corroborated by inspector and leave. I talk to inspector, who by the way did not get paid for his time, and did not agree with the information they used to back out of the deal. Did the home need work, yes, it was old and needed a real face-lift. But it was not falling down either. They did not want to hear what inspector had to say. Needless to say we will not show them any additional homes.

When I owned my bridal shop I saw the mother of the bride do similar things to the brides who would not stand up to them.So if I bride asked for my advice, I would tell her to keep the family out of it until she had reached a decision. I say the same for buying a house, wait until the ink is dry then bring in the family. When you buy a home, the only people who need to love it is the people who are going to live in it.