Susan Emo in Kingston/Brockville/Gananoque

"The tongue is like a razor; you can do good or cut someone with your words" ~Author unknown.

Contrary to the esteemed Dr Freud's theory that the primary human drives are to seek pleasure and to avoid pain, I believe what we want most is to find happiness and to find meaning or purpose. We want to know that we have lived fully and experienced joy with a deep feeling of contentment. Country singer, Tim McGraw's song comes to mind: "To Live Like You are Dying". Happiness is about the moments in our lives and the meaning or purpose is about our sense of connection.

In Anna Karenina, Tolstoy writes that "happy families are all alike; but every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way". That seems to ring true when you speak with happy people - they each have certain things in common in terms of how they live their life. The secrets to happiness if you will. But simply knowing the secrets doesn't quite do it. We all know that we're supposed to eat well, exercise and not smoke, etc. But that doesn't keep us from our vices. The people who live these happy lives not only know the secrets but apply them daily! We have to decide that we're going to happy and that's that!

The First Secret: BE TRUE TO YOURSELF!
The greatest tragedy in life is to spend your whole life fishing only to discover that it was not fish you were after ~Henry David Thoreau

To live with intention, we need to continually and regularly ask three critical life questions:

•1. Am I following by heart and being true to myself?

•2. Is my life focused on the things that really matter to me?

•3. Am I being the person I want to be in the world or am I living someone else's expectatations?

The Second Secret: LEAVE NO REGRETS!!

The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.
~Harriet Beecher Stowe

Regret is possibly the one thing we all fear the most; that we might look back on our lives and wish we had done things differently. To leave no regrets we must live with courage, moving toward what we want rather than away from what we fear. To leave no regrets we must overcome the inevitable disappointments that life hands us. We cannot ever be guaranteed of success but we can guarantee failure merely by choosing not to try at all! Always ask yourself: Fear or Faith?

Get into the habit of asking yourself at the end of each week:

•1. Did I act out of fear this week? How do I want to be more courageous next week?

•2. How am I responding to the setbacks in my life right now? Am I stepping forward or retreating?

•3. What might I do differently right now if I were living from the perspective of an old person on the porch looking back at my life?

The Third Secret: BECOME LOVE!

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion
~The Dalai Lama

Choose to see others with kindness. It is like a courtship. When you first get together with someone, you focus almost entirely on the things you like about the other person. But over time, people tend to focus more and more on the things which irritate them about the other person rather than what they like. If people would just turn that ratio around, most marriages and families would be so much better. When I hear of couples not getting along, on the brink of separation, I ask them to write down the Top Ten things they were attracted to in the beginning. I then ask them if they can add to the list, what else did they discover was wonderful about their partner? If they can focus on the good, the not-so-good usually fades away. Do good if you can, but always do no harm! Try to lift them up in some way. By what we say and do we can either make someone day or ruin it. The tongue is like a razor; you can do good or cut someone with your words.

More to think about each week:

•1. Did I make room for friends, family and relationships this week? Did I allow things to be more important than people?

•2. Was I kind and loving this week to the people closest to me? How can I improve upon this?

•3. Did I act as if each stranger was someone for whom l I could make a difference?

•4. Am I planting flowers or weeds in my self-conscious mind this week? Did I engage in negative self-talk or did I lift my spirit?

THE FOURTH SECRET: LIVE THE MOMENT!

Life lived for tomorrow will always be just a day away from being realized ~Leo Buscaglia

If life goes by quickly, then one of the secrets to happiness is to get more out of the time we have, to find a way that each moment and each day become great gifts. Don't focus on the past or the future but experience each moment with gratitude and purpose. We have power in each moment to contentment and happiness. Every day is a gift. ("To Live Like You were Dying" !) Happiness is all in your head. Here are some more things to think about:

•1. Did I really enjoy myself this week? Was I in the moment or did I just show up?

•2. Did I take every pleasure available to me or did I just run through the week?

•3. What am I grateful for this week? Did I find myself saying "I would be happy if only . . ."?

•4. Did I live in the present or did I let tomorrow or yesterday steal the day's happiness?

THE FIFTH SECRET: GIVE MORE THAN YOU TAKE!
An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

Ask what life expects of you not what you expect from life. Did you know that we have a great deal of control over what we give, but almost none over what we get. Each day we have the power to give without limit, to leave the world better in some way. Giving connects us to something larger. And in the act of doing so, happiness finds us!

The last questions I want you to think about each week:

•1. Did I make the world a better place in some small way?

•2. Did I remind myself this week that I am making a difference, even if I don't see it?

•3. Was I focused myself or my contribution to the world this week?

•4. Can I stop judging the life I've lived and get on with what life I may still have left to live?

Keep your vision and keep focused. Trust in yourself and keep going toward your goal; you will get there, you might not know how, but you will!

I believe in you,

"One Person can make a difference - and every person must try"

~ John F. Kennedy

"When two or more people come together in the spirit of harmony ...it's like putting LIGHTNING in a Bottle! The Teddy Stallard story and the Blue Ribbon story have the capacity to reach out to people to make a huge difference in all humanity. We must be the difference we want to make."

~ Mary Robinson Reynolds

1000 Islands, Gananoque, Canada

This October 25th, on "Make a Difference Day" I am incorporating the "Who I am Makes a Difference" Blue Ribbon ceremony into, what will hopefully become, an annual event in my community. We have too many people not realizing their full potentional. Not taking pride in who and what they are. We also have nighbours who are living their lives by example, getting no thanks or recognition for all that they do. We have young people feeling the need to turn to drugs for acceptance in a clique. And, simply too many people not being appreciated, thinking that what they do doesn't count.

Well it does count! To Me!! And hopefully, to many many others as well. I will admit I am doing this for selfish reasons . . . I want to re-energize my workplace culture--and inspire greater loyalty--using the power of compassion.

For those of you who are not familiar with these two stories, perhaps you saw the movie "Pay it Forward" ? I can't tell you how many times I have viewed this movie and each and every time it has moved me that little bit more until I now have this uncontrollable need to share it with everyone with whom I come in contact . You can view the clip below

Blue Ribbon Movie

"Success is about experiencing the best of yourself. You have an innate ability to be whatever your heart pulls you toward. And yes, it takes integrity to acquire a sense of self which says, "Yes I can, yes I can, yes I can." It takes integrity to attain a high level of self-esteem which attracts success in all arenas of your life. So BE IT, HAVE IT, OWN IT - ENJOY IT!"

Think about joining me in some way, in your own community! October 25th is not too far away so think of what you can do this year in the short term and create some big plans for next year.

This is a followup of Lara O'Keefe's scary reminder of how vulnerable we can be
http://activerain.com/blogsview/648086/Trust-Your-Instincts

There is a fabulous book called "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin De Becker:
Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence.

The Author says victims of violent behavior usually feel a sense of fear before any threat or violence takes place. They may distrust the fear, or it may impel them to some action that saves their lives. A leading expert on predicting violent behavior, de Becker believes we can all learn to recognize these signals of the "universal code of violence," and use them as tools to help us survive. Far from being silly intuitions, often these can truly show when something is wrong and violence might be imminent; if listened to, along with information about how violent people behave, these feelings might protect us from harm. The book teaches how to identify the warning signals of a potential attacker and recommends strategies for dealing with the problem before it becomes life threatening. The case studies are gripping and suspenseful, and include tactics for dealing with similar situations.

A must-read for anyone dealing with strangers on a daily basis - US!! Be safe,

Balance returns to recreational property markets across Canada this year, says RE/MAX

Mississauga, ON (June 10, 2008) - After an extended period of extraordinary growth, more balanced market conditions have emerged in recreational property markets across the country, according to a report released today by RE/MAX.

The RE/MAX Recreational Property Report found that a substantial increase in the supply of recreational properties listed for sale, combined with fewer buyers overall, characterized most recreational markets this year. Of the 45 markets surveyed, 91 per cent (or 41 markets) were in the transition stage, moving from strong sellers into balanced market conditions. The only exceptions were Salt Spring Island, two markets in Saskatchewan - Last Mountain Lake and Qu'Appelle Lakes and Lakes Candle, Emma, and Waskesiu -- and Newfoundland's East Coast - where inventory levels were relatively low. Affordability was a primary factor in 35 per cent of markets surveyed, given serious upward pressure on recreational values in recent years.

"Market conditions have shifted, but don't expect to see bargain basement prices or fire sales," says Michael Polzler, Executive Vice President and Regional Director, RE/MAX Ontario-Atlantic Canada. "The recreational market continues to experience solid demand -- a trend that is expected to continue throughout 2008. The influx of new listings has yet to translate into downward pressure on recreational property prices. Prime waterfront properties, while more plentiful than in year's past, will still command top dollar."

Gananoque

The market for recreational properties in Gananoque is just starting to take shape, as accessibility improves and the traditional tourist season gets underway. To date, sales are on par with last year's levels, while average price has experienced a marginal increase. Th e typical starting price for a three-bedroom, winterized recreational property on a standard-sized waterfront lot is $300,000, but the same property on the St. Lawrence will cost $500,000. More seasonal product on waterfront will start at $200,000 or $350,000 on lakefront.

Baby boomers with retirement in mind are most active in the market, buying up properties priced from $200,000 to $300,000. Many are looking for properties requiring a little sweat equity in prime locations. Renovation is on the upswing as a result. American vendors are also active in the marketplace, cashing in on equity gains in recent years and parity. Limited inventory levels are expected to place upward pressure on prices this year on the St. Lawrence River and Charleston Lake.

The upper-end of the market has been quiet, with sales matching last year's steady pace. An influx of new upscale listings may serve to jumpstart activity in 2008. The most expensive sale to date was priced at $580,000, while the priciest listing is $1,875,000.

Kingston

Aff ordability is a major factor in Kingston's recreational property market. Starting price for a three-bedroom, winterized waterfront property on a 75 ft. lot is $179,900, while a seasonal property with similar water frontage is priced at $165,000. Sales have softened in the area as a result of a long drawn-out winter and a noticeable decline in American buyers. The number of recreational homes sold is down 20 per cent so far this year, with 43 sales occurring year-to-date, down from 54 sales during the same period one year ago, due to weather. Aging baby boomers are fueling the market for a wide range of product. Flush with disposable income, boomers are purchasing luxury cottages in sought-after waterfront areas. As such, activity in the upperend in the market is on par with levels recorded in 2007.

Desirable lakes in the area include Loughborough, Sydenham, Buck and Bob's Lake. Many retirees are also taking advantage of market conditions in the US, snapping-up bargain-priced second homes in Florida or Texas. The most active price range is between $200,000 and $300,000. Listings are in good supply virtually across the board. More budget-minded buyers are considering the purchase of vacant lots, starting at $50,000, for modular homes or new builds. Older cottages are also an option, with renovating always a future consideration.

With a good selection of affordable properties available for sale in the Kingston area, activity is expected to flourish in the summer months. The new trend is for larger, more deluxe properties with bigger boats, more exterior lighting and longer use throughout the year.

What kind of a dog you have tells more about you then you know. From pure breeds to the best loved mutts, each dog will have a personality or habit that it shares with the owner. (Some dog owners even share their dogs look - you've seen them on Letterman)

I have 2 Australian Shepherds and if we believe the above, what this says about me is that I am:

Easy going, a perpetual puppy that loves to play. Courageous, loyal and affectionate. Excellent children's companion and great with active children. A devoted friend and guardian, naturally protective. Very lively, agile and attentive - eager to please, with a sixth sense about what is wanted. Highly intelligent and easy to train. Though aggressive when at work, gentle with human friends. Needs lots of exercise and a job to do, very intelligent, active and easily bored. Can become nervous and destructive if left alone too much without exercise. Naturally suspicious of strangers. Quiet workers, unlike some which are bred to bark constantly.

I guess that is me in a nutshell thanks to my dog selection! What does your dog selection say about you?

This is Kylie our adopted girl and below is Sheila who chose her!