Janet Pearson

Being in the real estate business, I am in the car a lot. Many times when I'm not dodging bullets or large trucks, I ponder the other vehicles on the streets of Southeast Florida. I wonder how many lives they represent as they too are dodging bullets, large trucks or talking on the phone? Could we be connected by the 6 degrees of separation? The real thing is how many people do we really touch? Does each car ultimately represent 200 or more people that are a part of their lives? I frequently visualize that the cars are surrounded by circles and that these circles encompass the other families and groups that come in contact with the driver of the car. Sometimes these circles overlap, and maybe some of these circles touch other cars that are equally a part of their lives. I think this all goes to say that we are connected to others. We influence others, create feelings good and bad. Just remember how you honk the horn at someone, and then that person is mad, and then they cut sharply in front of another car or yell at someone at work or at home. Then those actions amplify to the others in their lives. Each person is a microcosm that expands into a macrocosm because of the myriad of connections that we truly have whether we are cognizant of them or not. It is good to remember that we influence many. A seemingly simple action can cause a ripple effect. We can be very potent. Our politeness encourages others to be polite. Our rudeness provokes rudeness. We influence others. So when driving or taking any other action, take the higher path, and as General Swarzkophf says " Do the right thing."

Similarly, we as Realtors can create joy or stress. We influence 100's of people just in one transaction, the buyers, the sellers, the other agent, the title people, the mortgage people, the insurance people, the appraiser, the surveyor, the inspection people, the staff in our office and with all of their families feeling effects of our conduct. Our competence or incompetence creates havoc or smooth sailing. Each of our actions has a cascading effect. We can be the butterfly creating a sunami or the butterfly creating a rainbow. Just remember we are important and powerful, and how we act and react has consequences not just for ourselves, but for hundreds of others. We are like movie stars placing our work out in the world for others to evaluate, not knowing who or how we will influence. Just let us all strive to be Oscar winners or at the very least make the list of nominees.

As Realtors we are always looking for just the right area to prospect, and frequently we find it right under our own noses or should I say fingertips? Well, here we are with another discovery; internet dating is a fine place to find new clients.

Think of the demographic and the psychology of the site itself. Let's face it; the people that you are meeting on the Internet are not satisfied with their lives. They want change, and when people want change that is an opportunity for us Realtors. The participants are widowed, divorced or simply lonely. You could spend hours searching public records, but at your computer you can just log into your favorite dating site and find the recently divorced or widowed person needing your assistance. Many of them show their income and their age. (Be a little careful with both as people have been known to lie on the Internet.) Remember you are doing your public duty by helping these needy people find new housing and maybe love. Even if they are not the right one for you, we all know lots of single people in the real estate world that you could refer them to.

Just like in real estate there are dishonest people. Remember the client who is coming into an inheritance or is winning a lawsuit and wants to plan ahead for when their ship comes in? They look endlessly at large homes that they are going to be able to afford. Wow! The parallels are endless! I found one guy on the dating site who wanted me to find a luxurious penthouse around Central Park. I was excited! A rich lover and a big real estate deal all in one package. I knew that this was heaven....but alas, the supposedly rich guy was just another scammer from Nigeria who was in a business tangle with all of his funds impounded. "Could you PLEEEZE help me out by wiring me some money?" He was the definition of "NEXT".

As you know if you're a good Realtor, you're always looking for new avenues of business. So why not in your internet dating search think of them as prospects for love AND real estate? Who knows you might find a mate and a new client all at the same time. I can attest that I have sold a house and rented a condo as a result of internet dating, but I'm still looking for Mr. Wonderful.

Who would have known that the profession of real estate prepares you for internet dating. Those of you who have been in the business for a number of years know that as careful as you try to be there are times that you throw a person in the car and off you go to visit a home or you meet someone that you have spoken to for a few minutes on the phone and then meet them at a vacant house. We all know that these are no no's, but sometimes we just do dumb things. Amazingly you do not do that in internet dating. You meet your prospect at some public place, sit and chat. You qualify them to see if further looking is necessary. Because you are accustomed to making people comfortable quickly and asking qualifying questions, your first encounter usually goes smoothly. As you can see, internet dating is safer than real estate.

Have you ever seen a picture of a house and it looks gorgeous, but when you visit it you want to hire the photographer because the reality of the house is 100% worse than the photos? Just like the dating sites, some of the pictures tell you a lot about the prospect, but sometimes you wonder why, why, why would they post some of those ridiculous shots or the photo makes you ask when you see them in person, "Who is that guy?"

What about lying? Have you ever had client say that they are going to pay cash and oops, they really meant that it would be "like cash" because they wouldn't have any problem getting a loan from their local banker? What about those prospects that tell you they MUST have a view, 4 bedrooms and a 3 car garage, but end up buying a 3 bedroom with no view and a 2 car garage? This is simply more preparation for dating on the internet. Of course some of them lie! Age, weight, money, job and the best lie is their marital status, but because we have experience with people who lie, we can handle it.

There is heartbreak in real estate just like internet dating. Sometimes you go out and show seemingly hundreds of properties, and then they stab you in the heart and go buy from someone else or tell you that you are not the right listing agent for them any longer. It's just like internet dating. You have long chats, go out several times, build rapport, develop real feelings for these people, and lo and behold they have decided that some other person is a better match for them or they just disappear. Sound familiar?

If you haven't ventured into the world of finding your future via internet dating, don't be afraid. It is EXACTLY like selling real estate. You know how to do it. Just remember the most important word to emotionally survive real estate and internet dating is......NEXT!