Jorge Vasquez

The Art of Negotiation

What NOT to do

While sitting in New York Supreme Court waiting for my lawyer and my ex's lawyer to come out of a conference with the judge, i eavesdropped on every conversation going on around me because my iphone had died. Like everyone else here, I was here for a divorce proceeding. Essentially I have wound up here because of an impasse in my negotiating skills. Then again when you are personally involved it is much harder to negotiate than when you are a third party. However, being a third party, as witnessed today, does not necessarily mean you have a clearer head or have no motives.

Many a blunder have occured when interested parties are involved. This is normal. What is abnormal is when the blunders occur from third parties that are supposed to have a clearer head.

Case 1
Today in court, the man next to me got joint custody, got his opponent to take on all marital debt, got the visitation rights he was seeking (he wasn't seeking custody), however, he didnt settle by stipulation. Why you ask me? Because his ex refused to return his XBox to him. It wasn't all his clothes that she threw out. It wasn't the furniture that he bought that had him upset. It all came down to an XBox and 4 games. Retail price <$600. He opted instead for a trial and the possibility that his child support payment will be increased. This, ladies & gentlemen, is what i call a WTF? moment. There was no need to curse but there are no better words to describe what had just happened. It would cost him close to $1000 to come back another day plus run the risk of paying more in child support. This WTF? moment is not only the fault of the man wanting the XBox but also his lawyer's fault. Instead of sitting down and explaining this to him, she berates him as to what her advice is instead of concentrating on the why. The man's stupidity or pride got the best of him but his negotiater (lawyer) didn't do much to prevent him from harming himself either but instead told him "i told you so" over and over again.

Case 2
i notice a man and a woman are arguing on the side. It turns out that the husband and wife had come to an agreement on a separation agreement without consulting their lawyers. Who were the two people arguing? The two lawyers. Hold on this isn't the moment yet. After each had reviewed their agreement and found nothing wrong with it or needed changes, the two start arguing over who knew about the agreement first and why they hadn't notified the other party. When i say argue i don't mean in a professional manner. I mean 5 year old "did not" "did so" arguing (literally) to the point that one threatened to advise their client that the agreement was not in their best interests and should back out. The WTF? moment responsibility belongs to both the lawyers. I haven't seen that kind of behavior since my boys were 8 & 6. SMH....

WHY would you argue over mundane things such as who knew about the agreement first? All the substantive issues had been settled everything else is irrelevant. Which leads us to another WTF? moment... WHY would you pay a lawyer $3200 to come to court with you when you already had the separation agreement taken care of? Yes that much because the husband footed the bill for both sides. This is stupidity on the husband's part or stubbornness on the wife's part (which obviously comes out on top because she walks away without having to pay a dime that day and most likely got everything she wanted in the agreement). Two of the lawyers in the courtroom murmerred while the couple went on the record for the seperation agreement.... "That was a waste of time" "That was a waste of money"

Case 3
Is a small WTF? moment but because it involved my own particular case i will not discuss it in here in detail. I will, however, say that it did bring a smile to my face and joy on the inside.

Lessons learned
*Pride comes before a fall
*Learn when to keep your mouth shut
*Don't take anything too seriously
*Make sure you get a good/professional lawyer
*4 out of the 6 lawyers observed yesterday seriously need to work on their negotiation skills & professional demeanor overall
*I'm glad i didn't hire one of those 4... lol

You can also read my blog on www.jorgevasquez.me

AFter a long hiatus from blogging for personal reasons.... i look back and see that my sign of the times was correct... last years lowered charity during toys 4 tots did in fact point to a deeper recession ahead.

We've seen what this means in the real estate market but from what i have noticed for real estate professionals this is actually a good thing. Agent numbers are much lower than they have been in the past fewer years and offices have closed down or "consolidated" or "merged" as a result. The increase of agents leaving the business leaves the business better off for those that are still in. Personally i think the exodus of agents is a good thing... and if anything we need to increase the standards of those entering.

In a world that has grown to be more consensus driven this sort of answer may not be what most are looking for. However, for the greater good, we are better off with less agents that are better trained and more knowledgeable than having more agents that are anything but knowledgeable or trained.

Some people are just not meant for this business and if that should be im sure they know it as well. It does a great disservice for them to stay not only to the public but also to themselves.

I wanted to put forth an ideal for new licensing and see what kind of criticisms would come of it.

NY recently increased its licensing requirements to 75 hours for a salespersons license. I motion to keep that in effect, however, for the broker's requirements i think that should be increased to 75 hours as well and in addition all brokers should have either a Bachelor's degree or at least 30 credits in business/real estate/law. This may seem unprecedented but i believe it is in the public's best interest to implement these rules and regs.

I know some critics may say that a Bachelors or 30 credits will not guarantee better agents..... but it will guarantee that they had the honesty to complete a course and pass (not just sit there and convert oxygen into carbon dioxide) . It will also guarantee that at one point in time they had the knowledge. Business courses would be preferred obviously because broker's are in a position to open their own firm or choose to work with another broker. I have much more to say but to keep this brief i will end it at that.

What does everyone else think?

I'm sure eveyone has always heard some variation of the following:

If Pro is the opposite of Con... the whats the opposite of Progress?

i realize today there is nothing more true than this. It was pointed out by a friend to me today that the act that congress ir proposing is unconstitutional. I decided to look into it myself. Article 1 Section 9 Clause 3 specifically states "No Bill of Attainder or ex post facto Law shall be passed" what does this mean in non lawyer speak? Basically Congress cannot pass a law that negatively affects a single person or group of people or negatively affects them retroactively. Am i the only one that cares?

Yes they were wrong to give out bonuses. Yes the government is inept in its oversight. But in this "Age of Obama" where transparency is supposed to be a great change from the Bush Administration, do we really have to take a few steps back to passing laws that violate peoples constitutional rights? The road to hell is paved with good intentions and i do not believe making two wrongs will make anything right. By allowing this law to go unchallenged we are allowing the government to one day retroactively raise our taxes for the past 3 years for ALL OF US!!! Or better yet, why not go back next year and say the $8000 dollar stimulus bonus should be paid back with penalties because those that buy houses are too well off?????? Really where does the stupidity end?

We as a country cannot allow unconstitutional acts be committed by anyone, least of all our Congress. Instead of laying blame on greed the American People should be outraged by government incompetency. If i had a chimpanzee that i was responsible and i left a gun on my table and the Chimpanzee killed someone with it, why castigate the chimp? The real culprit is the one in charge who let things happen. And yes i'm calling the AIG execs a bunch of Baboons. Apparently the jokes on us though because it appears that the baboons are being supervised by the Dodo birds.

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Well the market has changed but the fundamentals are still the same. If you work hard you will survive and maybe even thrive. However, it is more likely that you will give up, pack up and leave. I see this more apparent in the Real Estate Offices closing and businesses closing in general.

I know I'm relatively young but in my 10 years as an adult (18+) i've never seen so many business go out of business on a local level let alone the national level. Stores are going vacant even on Steinway Street. The broader market is having its toll on the local market and of course vice versa. Even charitable giving has taken a hit.

As a Marine Reservist i worked the toys 4 tots program for 8 years. i went to visit my war buddies this past week. I've never seen it so depressing there before in 9 years. Charitable giving to the toys 4 tots program is at an all time low. To give this some meaning The 40X150ft Warehouse that housed the toys this year amounted just a little over 4000 toys. Thats alot but to compare it to previous years its petty. I remember one year the warehouse was filled to the top (about 25 ft high) and that year in total (really month) we gave out just over 1 million toys and still had a warehouse full of toys filled to the top of the warehouse with barely enough room to walk.

Don't know what the future holds but if i can judge it by charitable giving (which in my opinion is one of the first things to get cut in a budge) then we are in for a big drop next year.

Merry Xmas Everyone!

So I decided to finally attend one of the LIBOR elections events..... needless to say I was left a little bit dissappointed.

The democratic process at the board level pretty much ends at senseless rhetoric and basically comes down to a popularity contest not even based on people's positions. Why do i say this? because in all of the ads the candidates just listed their resume and that they will help realtors and that they are the best choice...... umm DUH! Not that they are bad people... because i don't know them at all to even be able to say that they are or arent.... it just seems like i might as well shut my eyes or just go with my gut feeling.

As far as the event went. It was mediocre at best. The vendors on site were great to talk to, however 6 vendors for an entire board doesnt seem like a great turnout.

The realtors attending also seemed to lack numbers. i saw many familiar faces but MANY EMPTY SEATS as well. i spoke to a wells fargo rep who said last year was MUCH MUCH more packed.

I have many fellow realtors who refuse to go to these events due to the "boring" factor both professionally and personally. I felt they were just being pessimistic and just didnt care. but to be honest they had a point. There does need to be a change... a BIG ONE in the content of the events, the board activities, and the election process itself. Who knows what the future holds at least it was a decent networking event if anything. Well Goodnight everybody!