Kenneth Bargers

Carpet is everywhere! People who understand carpet know that its immense success and consumer acceptance is not due to chance. Few construction materials offer the advantages that carpet does. Carpet is colorful, comfortable and yet easy to maintain. Even though it appears expensive, it is often the most economical choice for floor covering. Carpet and rugs found on the floors of residences and commercial buildings still represent a substantial investment. In light of this, is it not wise to maintain them correctly?

Like all textile materials, the beauty and life of a carpet depends largely on the care that it is given. Proper maintenance can add years of attractive life. Specific maintenance procedures for carpet are determined by where the carpet is installed. In general, proper maintenance involves regular vacuuming and periodic cleaning by methods such as hot water extraction, shampooing, bonnet cleaning, foam cleaning, etc. Real Full Story...

APHORISMS

1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.
2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.
3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.
4. Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?
7. Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.
8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?
9. Scratch a cat and you will have a permanent job.
10. No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy a car.
11. There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.
12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number at 4 AM. - Like this: It could be a right number.
13. No one ever says 'It's only a game.' when their team is winning.
14. I've reached the age where the happy hour is a nap.
15. Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.
16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
17. Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?(And rap music will be the Golden Oldies !
18. Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.
19. After 60, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead!
20. Always be yourself. Because the people that matter, don't mind. And the one's that mind, don't matter.
21. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

"The work goes on, the cause endures, the hope still lives and the dreams shall never die."  Senator Edward Kennedy

"There is no morality in the mushroom cloud. The black rain of nuclear ashes will fall alike in the just and the unjust. And then it will be too late to wish that we had done the real work of this atomic age -- which is to seek a world that is neither red nor dead." Senator Edward Kennedy

"Frankly, I don't mind not being president. I just mind that someone else is." Senator Edward Kennedy

"Separation of church and state cannot mean an absolute separation between moral principles and political power." Senator Edward Kennedy

"The Constitution does not just protect those whose views we share; it also protects those with whose views we disagree." Senator Edward M. Kennedy

"Integrity is the lifeblood of democracy. Deceit is a poison in its veins." Senator Edward M. Kennedy

PREGNANT BLONDE

The other day my neighbor, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway jumping for joy!

I didn't know why she was jumping so excitedly but I thought, 'what the heck' and I starting jumping up and down along with her.

She said, "I have some really great news!"

I said, "Great. Tell me why you're so happy."

She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, told me that she was pregnant.

I knew she'd been trying for a while so I told her, "That's great I couldn't be happier for you!"

Then she said, "There's more."

I asked, "What do you mean there's more?"

She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby.

We are going to have TWINS!"

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant,

I asked her how she knew. She said....

"Well, that was the easy part. I went to Sam's Club and they actually had a home pregnancy kit in a TWIN-pack. Both tests came out positive!"

BLONDE PUZZLE

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,

"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nicecup of tea, and then," he said with a deep sigh. .. . ... .. ..

"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."