Lincoln Crum

Click on the link below to read my latest blog post that is on Realtor.org Young Professional Network Lounge....hope you enjoy.

http://ypnlounge.blogs.realtor.org/2009/09/08/the-magic-is-in-the-monotony/

www.ReachLincoln.com

I walked into my dad's office and told him what the old man said. I thought, there's no getting out of this, I might as well meet my maker. My dad agreed to drive and we headed to Louisville. The ride was less than 10 miles but it felt like a 1,000 mile journey. We pulled up in front of an old building with a sign out front that said "Scrap and Junk." The only other thing that I remember was a brand new white Jaguar sitting out front. Surely to goodness it didn't belong to anyone who owned a scrap yard.

As we got out of the car and walked into the front door we were greeted by Mr. Bidder, sitting behind a huge desk covered with ledger books, papers and who knows what else. He had a big cigar in his mouth and a huge grin on his face. I walked up to his desk, taking everything I had to speak, and apologized for the way I had handled the situation. He looked at me and told me that it's not a wise move to scream, yell and cuss at people, especially on the phone.

As I stood in front of this man I was overcome with embarrassment, shame and frustration, all at the same time. Swallowing my pride wasn't easy but I found it in myself to take my licks and step up to the plate of manhood.

Mr. Bidder handed me a check, told me that he wasn't going to worry about the stop payment fee and gave me his hand to shake. I apologized again, shook his hand and thanked him for his understanding. When I turned to walk out the door I noticed Mr. Bidder telling my dad that he should be proud of me, he said not many young men would do what I did. As I was making my way out the door as fast as I could I saw dad walk over, shake hands with Mr. Bidder and thank him.

When we got in the car all I could do was hold back the tears and reflect on what just happened. Time stood still for a minute. The ride back to the office wasn't nearly as long as the one there and it was a great deal easier to talk to my dad.

Two weeks later my friend Bob Loeffler called and told me that his wife found the check laying on the floor in the bathroom from when I was at their house. I have to believe that if Bob would have called me the day I lost the check I wouldn't have learned the lesson.

On the way over to make peace with Mr. Bidder I was a boy, on the way home I had made giant strides into becoming a man.

http://reachlincoln.com/2009/09/02/junk-manpart-3.aspx

www.ReachLincoln.com

The next morning rolled around and I was at the auction site at 8 am, with no one else in sight. I gave Mr. Bidder until 9 am to show before I called him back. 9 am rolled around and I called him once again. He answered and before he could get a word in edge wise I started in on him. In between my rants and raves he told me that he had truck troubles but someone was on the way. I spouted an ultimatum or two and just as I was hanging up my phone his workers had arrived. About time!

The first thing they did was give me the check and I had a very strong sense of satisfaction and victory, I won. They tried explaining and backing up each excuse that had been used for the past couple of days but I was too busy gloating about my victory to pay attention. I showed Mr. Bidder that you can't push a young man around; he got a good piece of my mind....so I thought.

I put the check in my pocket, made sure they got everything loaded up and I locked the doors. I then had an obligation to help my friend Bob Loeffler move a family member. I went to Bob's house, changed clothes and went on with the rest of my day. My friend Bob Loeffler

The next morning I got to work and my dad asked me for the check so he could get it deposited and then deliver all of the funds to the SBA. When I looked in my briefcase, folder, auction file, pants pocket, shirt pocket, jacket pocket the check was nowhere to be found. It had evaporated, gone forever. I explained to my dad that it was at my apartment and I'd be right back. I ransacked my apartment; the check was gone, to never be found again.

Upon the arrival back at our office I explained to dad that I had lost the check and didn't know what I was going to do. Dad smiled and said, "There's only one thing to do, you have to call the man and ask him to cut you a new check. Make sure you offer to pay the stop payment fee and then go pick it up at his office." My first reaction was to object, there was no way I would call this man, let alone go see him. I refused. Dad's smile turned to a frown and he explained that I didn't have a choice. He told me it was time to step up, be a man and accept responsibility for my actions.

I was literally scared to death. How could I find the courage to call someone who I treated so poorly? Life just wasn't fair and I didn't know what to do. So I did what I had to do, I picked up the phone and called him. The first thing I did was apologize for acting a fool over the past couple of days and explained the dilemma of his "lost check." He was kind and told me that I would have to pay the stop payment fee but he would re-cut a check. I was so relieved; I asked him to put it in the mail and proceeded to give him the address to our office. He interrupted me and said the only way he'd re-cut a check is if I would come pick it up myself at his office. Things had gone from bad to worse, I was not going to get out of this alive!

Part 3 to follow...

http://reachlincoln.com/2009/09/02/junk-manpart-2.aspx

www.ReachLincoln.com

For as long as I can remember I've always been very fortunate to surround myself with good friends. My earliest memories of structured friendship began in the third grade. I met a kid sitting next to me on the very first day of class, his name was Ben Rodway. To this day I consider Ben one of my very best friends. Unfortunately we've lost a little bit of a connection the last couple of years. Ever since he returned home from the war in Iraq. That's okay because we go through these spells in our life. We'll go 3 or 4 years without talking and then the next thing you know we pick right up where we left off, without missing a beat.

I became pretty good at cultivating friendships as I got older and have always tried to have a good core group of people around me who are positive and also like to stay connected. About 10 years ago I started working very hard on the relationship element in my life, especially with the men in my life.

It gives me great pride to call someone a friend and in turn be just as good of a friend. I believe friendships are a lot like crops. You have to nurture them, pay attention to the elements and hopefully harvest many returns as you move through life.

I've always had a "best friend" but as of late that has shifted. I have lots of best friends, with my wife leading the pack. I describe a best friend as someone who brings contentment to your life. Someone that you can just hop in the car with and take off down the road without even having to talk. The silent energy that is created between both people is enough to fuel your happiness.


My dad always told me that if you have 2 or 3 really good friends in life you're lucky. I've always had at least 10 people that I can say are some of my best friends. I mean someone that you can confide in unconditionally. Right now I think that number is about 12 or 13. At any given moment I can pick up the phone and call one of these people and they'll listen to what I have to say, and I return the favor just as easy by listening or asking them about their day.

Sometimes I go through periods when I don't want to speak with anyone but that's a rarity. Any given day I'll reach out to 25 or 30 people, just checking in to see how their day is going. From a retrospective point of view I believe this is what keeps me going every day. I get up in the morning thinking about all of the great things that could come my way....usually involving a friend or two.

Chinese symbol for Friendship

http://reachlincoln.com/2009/09/01/the-open-road.aspx

I have a very good friend by the name of Leonard "Bud" Roach who grew up with my mom and dad and is a very interesting person. Bud has done it all, served his country in the Marines, ran his own business for 30+ years as an auto body man, world champion whole hog BBQ'r, been a good dad-grandfather-husband and one of his proudest accomplishments, a wonderful brother to his sisters.

Bud has stories after stories about his life, both good and bad. A couple of years ago we took him on a road trip to see a Jimmy Buffet concert and he kept us entertained with stories for the entire trip up, all day long and the trip back home. I've had countless one on one conversations with Bud and there's always a lesson once you leave.

I was at Bud's shop next to his house a couple of years ago and we started on the subject of helping people. Bud has quite the reputation around our community for helping people, especially those that appear to be down on their luck. This one particular evening seemed more philosophical than others so I just let Bud talk, happily letting him weave a good story filled with anecdotes and lifes lessons.

There was one night that Bud came to our now closed go-kart track with his sisters to ride the go-karts. At the time, Bud's sister, Connie, was having a losing battle with cancer. She loved racing and NASCAR and wanted to take a spin around our track one last time. Her health was failing fast and getting in and out of the kart proved to be quite challenging but with the help of Bud, his sisters and our awesome manager, Rob Gray, she finally got tucked into the seat and took off like a bat out of hell! Not sure how many laps she made it but it was enough to fulfill her inner soul with excitement.

As Bud recounted this story for me I noticed tears welling up in his eyes. He told me that Connie didn't live much longer after that night but when it was her time to go she seemed quite content with her life. Bud shared something with me that has stuck ever since and probably will for the rest of my life. He said when Connie was in her last days she told him that she was proud that she was a WE person and not a ME person. Bud told me that Connie said this a lot during her life, she'd say we all have two choices in life, we can choose to be a WE person and help people or a ME person and remain focused solely on ourselves.

Bud looked at me with his eyes filled with tears and thanked me for facilitating that go-kart ride for his sister, he said it's nice to surround yourself with more WE people than ME people. Now, I use that as a guiding light every single day of my life. It's very easy for us all to get caught up in the hurried aspects of everyday life and remain focused on ME but the real challenge and most rewarding is to live your life as a WE person.

"Birds of a feather tend to flock together" couldn't me more true here, I'm a WE person and plan on spending the rest of my life with as many other WE people in our community....thanks Bud and Connie.

http://reachlincoln.com/2009/08/27/me-people-and-we-people.aspx