Myrtle Beach Real Estate by Mirela Monte

You've worn the finish off your coffee table.

All your kids are named Joe.

Chuck Yeager thinks you need to calm down.

Instant coffee takes too long.

Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.

People can test their batteries in your ears.

People get dizzy just watching you.

Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.

The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.

The only time you're standing still is during an earthquake.

The Taster's Choice couple wants to adopt you.

When someone asks 'how are you' you say, 'good to the last drop'.

You buy milk by the barrel.

You can jump-start your car without cables.

You can outlast the Energizer bunny.

You can take a picture of yourself from ten feet away without using the timer.

You can type sixty words per minute with your feet.

You can't even remember your second cup.

You channel surf faster without a remote.

You chew on other people's fingernails.

You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.

You don't get mad, you get steamed.

You don't need a hammer to pound in nails.

You don't sweat, you percolate.

You don't tan, you roast.

You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.

You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked.

You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.

You go to sleep just so you can wake up and smell the coffee.

You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.

You have a conniption over spilled milk.

You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.

You have to watch videos in fast-forward.

You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.

You help your dog chase its tail.

You introduce your spouse as your coffee mate.

You just completed another sweater and you don't know how to knit.

You lick your coffeepot clean.

You name your cats Cream and Sugar.

You short out motion detectors.

You ski uphill.

You sleep with your eyes open.

You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.

You speak perfect Arabic without ever taking a lesson.

You speed-walk in your sleep.

You spend every vacation visiting Maxwell House.

You think being called a drip is a compliment.

You think CPR stands for Coffee Provides Resuscitation.

You'd be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison.

Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.

Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyds of London.

Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.

Your life's goal is to amount to a hill of beans.

Your lips are permanently stuck in the sipping position.

Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.

Your only source of nutrition comes from Sweet & Low.

Your taste buds are so numb; you could drink your lava lamp.

Your Thermos is on wheels.

You're so wired, you pick up AM radio.

You've built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.

You've worn out the handle on your favorite mug.

Foreclosures increased over 80% in 2008. The figures are no less scary in 2009:

The foreclosure rates in several states were up significantly lately: Arizona was up 36.1% for September. Florida was not far behind with a 29.67% increase, followed by: Texas 24.38%, Michigan 18.22% and California with a 15.57% increase. All 50 states saw an increase in foreclosures, but not all were as drastic. For example, the increase in Kansas was only 3.65%.

The major increases were driven mainly by changes in urban areas. In Arizona, the statewide foreclosure deluge was fostered by a massive 81.37% increase in Phoenix Foreclosures. Other cities with big increases included: Las Vegas, NV at 47.47%, Atlanta, GA at 39.96%, Chicago, IL at 36.27% and Houston, TX at 33.29 percent.

While the Federal Government is struggling with their impeded programs, states have started to take action to protect the fabric of our society.

I am proud to say that my very own South Carolina was the first state in the union to take action against Foreclosures judicially. In May the SC Supreme Court temporarily stopped thousands of pending foreclosure sales in order to give homeowners more time to take advantage of new federal programs to help them refinance mortgages. The injunction — which mortgage experts said appeared to be the nation's first court-ordered stop for an entire state — prevents judges in South Carolina from finalizing foreclosure sales on properties guaranteed by Freddie Mac, Fannie Mae or any other mortgage company that has signed on to a federal assistance program.

In April, the South Carolina legislature has introduced House Bil 3952, which, if adopted during the '09-'10 session, will provide for a 6 months Moratorium on Foreclosures in this state.

Diametrically opposed, Geographically and otherwise, California implemented its own Foreclosure Moratorium in June. Banks in California can no longer foreclose on a mortgage without either renegotiating the loan or giving the homeowner three months’ notice. There have been more than 365,000 foreclosures in California since 2007, with many more already scheduled.

“California is ground zero for foreclosures. We’re getting about 80 to 90,000 foreclosure filings every month. That’s one every 30 seconds, so until we start mitigating the number of foreclosures, our economic recovery is going to be hampered,” said Assemblyman Ted Lieu, the Torrance Democrat who authored the bill.

In Detroit, citizens are organizing a massive movement scheduled for November 7th, asking the state legislators and their Governor to impose a state-wide moratorium on Foreclosures and support Senate Bill 29, which provides for a 2 year moratorium on Foreclosures. The People’s call to action urges: Bail out the people—not the banks!

Meanwhile, Ohio’s legislators are in a heated debate over a 6-month Foreclosure Moratorium already approved by the House.

What we are seeing here is National Movement of MONUMENTAL PROPORTIONS. By taking a stand on this incredibly important issue – Foreclosures – we are seeing increased autonomy of the individual states. Add to the mix a general disgruntlement with our Federal Government and its BIG BUSINESS largess and what we have here is a precipitous movement towards the decentralization of power. Just my two cents’ worth.

The following two movies provide the most thourough information on the Foreclosure Crisis. The House of Cards made my skin crawl. Please watch it and let me know what you think of it. We need to be aware of how we've arrived at this juncture, this moment in history our children will talk about..

The Meltdown

The House of Cards

Here are a few other interesting sites to keep your finger on the pulse of this Foreclosure Crisis:

The Everything You Need Foreclosure Site - My gift to you

How to get your hands on some of that Obama Money for your Turf

Foreclosures 101 - Analyze Foreclosures by State, County and Zip Code

I am about to embark on my own journey to help those displaced by this crux. Please stay tuned to my blog roll, for I will soon ask for your help in a very important undertaking, one that will allow us Realtors a unique opportunity to expose the very human factor so visible to us agents, yet so overlooked by the media. There is an opportunity for us to take a stand and contribute to the solution.

Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Real Estate Foreclosure Connection

Will the bank accept your lousy offer? Let’s re-iterate the facts:

1. This is a Buyers’ Market.

2. There are plenty of Distressed Properties to choose from.

3. A qualified Buyer (one who is buying in cash OR is pre-approved for a loan) is worth his weight in gold, or brick, sort of speak… You know what I mean...

4. Banks are not in the business of owning homes.

5. The longer a vacant home stays on the market, the more it deteriorates.

6. Banks are not in the business of owning homes. Hey, wait a minute, I’ve said that already! Never mind, it’s worth repeating the point; it's an important one!

I’ve encountered some timid Buyers who are reluctant to make substantially lower offers. I urge them to go ahead and insult the Bank anyway. If they don’t get their price, they can always come back and offer more, or make another offer on a different bank owned home. As long as you don’t get emotionally invested, you’ll eventually be able to garner yourself a great deal.

In order to make my point and offer some concrete evidence, I am submitting this list of Myrtle Beach Bank owned Homes. The pricing activity is listed in chronological order for each one of these Foreclosures. Some have had contracts on them which never came to fruition and back on the market they went. All of these listings are still available and all of them are bank owned properties in the Myrtle Beach area.

Take the first property for example. As a fresh Waterway Foreclosure, it was initially offered for sale in May ’08 for $1,390,000. A year and a half and three price reductions later, it got dropped down to $795,000 (a 43% price decrease). It will probably sell for around the same price as another Waterway Foreclosure located right down the street, which closed recently in the $600K range.

After studying these, you too will be convinced that your lousy offer on a Bank owned property might actually get you the home of your dreams for pennies on the dollar. At least in Myrtle Beach it will!

MLS# 823031 - 7530 Maple Swamp Rd

Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Bank Owned Homes Connection Myrtle Beach REO’s To Go!

My father used to caution us kids against consumerism: “Look around you; most people never have enough money. When they make two dollars, they spend four. Me and your mom, when we make two dollars we spend 10 cents.”

I must admit that daddy’s teachings went against what I learnt in school. Our society encourages “spending other people’s money” – “leverage”, they call it.

Here we are in 2009, scratching our heads. What happened? Is this “leverage” thing not all it’s cracked up to be? Should we have been more prudent? Maybe it’s time to go back to basics. In that vein, I propose establishing some fiscally healthy habits:

1. With all due respect, Daddy, I can’t make two dollars and spend only 10 cents. I do think that I can get by on about 50 cents though. Instead of Gucci and Cartier, I opt for a no name brand. Instead of eating out, I cook in; it’s healthier anyway and a lot less expensive. I buy it in bulk at Costco and shop at the Farmers’ Market. I get good quality at discount prices, because I pay attention…

2. I know I can afford a much larger and fancier home than this, but why spend the money on it? Instead, I’d rather use that money and buy some other homes, rent them out and let them pay for themselves.

3. If I don’t have 20% to put down on a home, I’ll wait until I do. I don’t like paying PMI, nor do I like other people taking care of my property taxes and insurance (escrows). When I buy a home I make sure I have enough money to pay all expenses for at least six months, just in case I have a hard time renting it. Better safe than sorry.

4. When I volunteered at the shelter I met several people who had lost everything because they didn’t have health insurance. I don’t want that to happen to my family, so I pay my premium every month automatically by direct draft.

5. I don’t want to be late with my mortgages, so my properties all get paid automatically as well. Just for good measure, I have it set up to draw more principal than required, so I can pay them off faster. It is amazing how much of a difference it has made.

6. Some of the money left over after my 50 cents allowance go to paying taxes with regularity. Some of it goes to my retirement accounts; I’m not going to be 29 forever, you know… The rest gets saved in order to buy more Real Estate. I believe in what I sell and I set a good example. How can I advise other investors, if I don’t invest myself?

7. Setting limits and staying within my means is not easy. I make choices every day. I want both shoes? Too bad! I’ll buy the pair I like and need the most and it better be priced in the two digits; no Gucci there either.. I’d love to fly first class. Too bad, it’s not in the budget! I’m just lucky to be able to travel, and I remind myself of that fact. Fancy hairdressers, manicures, spa treatments? Yeah, that would be nice, but I never have the time for it anyway. I don’t smoke or have any other unhealthy habits, I eat clean and I exercise. No fancy spa or doctor treatments can give me what those good habits can…

Learning Fiscal Discipline is a process, but one well worth the prize: independence from worry. “Taming your money” will give you peace of mind and will allow you to make better choices. I think Daddy would be proud…

I’m sure I may have missed some fine points. If so, please bring them to our attention! I would love to hear from you about the healthy fiscal habits you have developed!

Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Real Estate Connection Join The Optimist Group!

Isn't technology great?  Now you can keep tabs on your kids' every move via the social media.  Here are two wonderful videos providing great tutorials on how to employ Twitter and Facebook to monitor your grown child’s every move.  Neurotic moms never had it so good!

Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Connection         Join me for LOL FRIDAY on the Optimist Group!