Renee Porsia

It seems like just about everyone I know now has a Facebook page. It has really become quite the phenomenon.

People are reconnecting with high school friends, old girlfriends and boyfriends, family, distant relatives and even making new friends. It seems to have taken the place of a good old fashioned pen-pal.

So, when does someone go from stranger to friend? That is a question that I recently started thinking a lot about. I originally created my Facebook page to network with other professionals. I wasn't looking to find new friends but things don't always end up like you thought they would. Now I have met so many new people and have made quite a few new "friends." Or have I?

The way to connect with people on Facebook is to ask someone you either know or don't know if they will accept you as a "friend." That person has the option to view the requesting person's profile to see if they know the person or find out who they are, where they live, what they do for a living, view personal photos and read what they are doing throughout the day. The requesting person cannot view those same details about the person they are requesting friendship from because that person's profile is set to private. They then have the option to accept the friend request or to ignore the friend request.

Do you really want to be friends with the person who is asking you to be friends with them?

Once someone has accepted the new friend, both people can now do such things as write on each others walls, comment on their status updates, view photos and comment on them, chat with them live, message them, send them cute, little (sometimes annoying) Facebook gifts such as a virtual drink, flowers, hugs, cakes and cookies.

People I have never met before have requested to be my friend and I have requested to become friends with some people that I didn't know. So, why would someone want to be friends with someone they have never met before? For me, it was about someone sharing the same interests with me, mostly. I do not accept everyone who requests to be my friend. Really -- I do look at everyone's profile before I accept them as a friend and for those who choose to accept me as a friend, I send a nice thank-you for the friend acceptance message.

I now even consider a few of the new people I have met to be actual friends. But can it be a one-sided friendship? Can both people have two different opinions of what friendship actually is? Friendship is defined as "a person you know well and regard with affection and trust." It makes sense to say "he was my best friend at the university." An acquaintance is defined as "a person with whom you are acquainted." I have trouble remembering the names of all my acquaintances.

I may be old-fashioned but I consider someone to be my "friend" once it goes beyond an occasional "Hi, how are you?" and moves on to talking almost every day and revealing personal details about yourself. Once you've exchanged phone numbers, what else could it be? You wouldn't give a perfect stranger (I hope) your personal phone number. Would you?

I actually have come to really like socializing on Facebook. It's great for networking and has allowed me to meet some really great people that I would have otherwise not had the opportunity to meet.

So what is my point here? My point is that unless you plan on actually talking to the person you accept as your "friend," you shouldn't accept them into your Facebook world. Talk about Facebook etiquette. How can it be considered good Facebook etiquette to accept someone as a "friend" only to just ignore that person and never speak with them? Or on the rare occasion that you do, you are very short with them or are cautious of their motives? Perhaps Facebook should be called "Friendbook" or "Aquaintancebook" and its members should only speak to their actual "friends." We should go back to good old-fashioned "fan pages" for those who want to be worshiped without all of the responsiblity of an actual friendship.

My intent was clear when I created my page. I wanted to network and that is what I have done and along the way, I have also made new friends.

What is your intent? Are you clear on your Facebook page? What do you have listed on your info page? Are you looking for a friendship, a relationship? To date, mingle or network? Be clear and don't mislead.

I thought everyone could use a good laugh so I thought I would poke fun of all the Realtors who love to say things like "I'm in the"top 1%", or "top producer", or "million dollar producer."

Top 1%? The top 1% of what, the UUWSO....the unprofessional, unethical, whiney, show off group of Realtors? The top 1% of Realtors with brown eyes who have the most clients named Kathy, the top 1% of Realtors who over price their listings, or how about the top 1% of Realtors who sold big white homes with red roofs on Friday afternoons? There is a catagory for everyone.

I'd like to give honorable mention to all of the Realtors who are actually top producing Realtors but fail to mention that they have 30 other agents working under them.

The million dollar producer. This is not hard to accomplish people. Any Realtor who sells a million dollars worth of real estate can use this great title.

Then there are the Realtors who like to tell you what clubs they are in such as the presidents club, platum club, the 100% club, the I make more than you club, the I sell more properties than anyone in my office club. Where are these clubs? Do they meet every wednesday night and is there a secret knock? I bet there is a Grand Poobah of the Loyal Order of Water Buffaloes too?

How about the Realtors who list all of the designations they have such as the I know how to work with older people designation or the I know how to use a computer designation or how about one of my favortes the I just bought a home for $10k this morning and I am going to sell it to my poor unsuspecting buyer this afternoon for $100k who is already paying me a commission and a finder's fee designation (you know who you are) or the I know how to work with a buyer designation and the my broker also knows how to work with buyers designation and finally the I know how to sell a home designation. Isn't that our job?

Thank you.

Mortgage companies really tick me off. Constantly misleading the public by putting deceiving information out there to attract business.

Telling consumers that they can get an interest rate of a certain percentage should not be allowed because the simple truth of the matter is that a bank cannot quote anyone any type of interest rate until a buyer finds a home and has an accepted Agreement Of Sale and even then, the buyer needs to lock in a rate. If the buyer does not lock the rate in, their rate will then be floating free to either go up or come down until it's locked.

By putting this misleading information out there, mortgage companies then make my job that much harder because I then have the wonderful pleasure of being the bearer of bad news having to tell an excited home buyer that the rate that they were quoted basically means nothing. If the rate was 5% the day that you spoke with the lender and by the time you get an excepted Agreement Of Sale, the rate is now be 6% now you may have to buy down your rate. It will also depend on your middle credit score. If you have a low score, expect to have a higher rate.

There is no rate to quote so stop quoting rates to consumers. Instead what the banks should be doing is educating consumers. Explaining to them how interest rates work, and how their interest rate will be determined as well as when it will be determined. Advise them of what they need to do to straighten up their credit if need be in order to be able to get the lowest rate available when they finally get an accepted offer, explain what it means to buy down thier rate and why it make sense to do so. Educate, educate, educate. Disclose, disclose, disclose. Stop misleading the public.

If you are a home buyer and you have spoken with a lender but do not have an accepted Agreement Of Sale at the time you meet with this lender no matter what the lender says, you cannot take advantage of any interest rate at that time.

What you can do is ask the lender to give you a Good Faith Estimate (GFE) which will list every single cost that you will be paying to purchase the home. Remember, it is just an estimate which means it could go up depending on price of home, interest rate, down payment, taxes and other fees. Since the lender does not know what your rate will be, they will naturally use some rate so that they can calculate your costs but its just an example. What you might want to do to be on the safe side is to ask for a few different scenarios using a low interest rate and a high interest rate so that you can see the difference.

Whenever I provide a buyer with an estimated closing cost sheet, I estimate all fees to be on the higher side to be safe and if the fees and rate are lower when they finally lock in, the buyer will have been prepared for the worst and receive the best.

Who does this misleading information wind up hurting? The consumer and it just makes the entire industry look bad and that just infuriates me.

I don't know if my blog will help anyone but at any rate, now you know.

For buyers, purchasing a home that is involved with a short sale can be a really great opportunity however be prepared to wait and wait and wait and oh, wait some more.

For those home owners who simply can't afford their monthly mortgage payments anymore and are facing foreclosure, are now turning to their banks and asking if their home can be approved for a short sale. In case you are not aware of what a short sale is, a short sale takes place when a home owner owes more on their home than what the home will eventually sell for and will not have enough to pay off their current mortgage. The bank can approve the sale of the home and essentially forgive any remaining monies due on the mortgage or in many instances mortgages therefore avoiding foreclosure.

But, what's with the name "short sale?" It's been my experience that a short sale isn't short at all, in fact, it's a very long, drawn out tedious process that can take months to close leaving many impatient buyers wondering if they will ever take possession of their new home.

So, why does it take so long? Well for one reason, many Realtors simply do not know what they are doing. Many Realtors think that once they send the offer over to the bank, that's the end of their responsibility and all that is left to do is wait for an answer. An answer that probably will never come. Once the offer is sent to what is called the loss mitigation department, it has to go through various departments for approvals. The bank needs to have an their own appraisal performed, they need to review all of the paperwork they requested from the buyer which includes what is called a hardship letter that explains why it is the home owner couldn't afford to pay their mortgage anymore as well as bank statements, comps, photos, tax returns and anything else they can think to ask for. They also need to see an estimated closing cost sheet which details just how much money the bank will be getting from the sale of the home. Each process can take weeks. The truth is that lenders usually just drag their heels in getting an answer back to the Realtor.

I think the name "short sale" confuses many buyers. Seriously. I've told many buyers exactly what the process involves and yet the buyer will still call every week to see if their offer was accepted. It's not just buyers it's Realtors to. I've had buyer agents call me every day to ask what is going on with their client's offer.

What I can say about a short sale is that yes, it can be a great opportunity for a buyer to get a very nice home for a great price but if you need to be in your new home quickly, a short sale is not for you. If you do not have patients, a short sale is definitely not for you. If you have a home to sell and do not have a place to stay if your home sells while you wait for an answer from the bank, a short sale is not for you.

There is nothing short about a short sale. The name is a bit deceiving though I am sure the name has absolutely nothing to do with how long the process actually takes, it still doesn't make explaining it any easier.

If you are a buyer who is involved with a short sale, be patient , make sure your Realtor is experienced with short sales before you ever view the property and understand that the seller has no say over what your offer is anymore. It's all in the bank's hands.

And that's the long and not so short of it.

Do you remember the Realtor who sold you your house? You should. It was a stressful time in your life. Don't you think you should remember the name of the person who put everything together for you and got you to the settlement table?

You have your family doctor, your mechanic, your hairdresser, your accountant and maybe even an attorney and you should also have your Realtor who you can contact should a need arise. You wouldn't just change doctors every time you fell ill or switch hairdressers every time you needed a hair cut. So why would you want to chance calling different Realtors when you are dealing with the most valuable asset you own?

If you do not remember who your Realtor was, that Realtor didn't do their job. If you are the type of person who thinks that once settlement is over, so is your relationship with your Realtor, you are wrong and misguided. It is my belief and practice that a Realtor's job only really starts after settlement. A Realtor's responsibility is to be there for every client not only during the transaction but most importantly, after the transaction is over.

Just as a consumer has the right to decide who they wish to work with when selling or buying a home, Realtors also have that same right. I make it a practice to decide if I would like to continue a relationship with a client before I get involved.

Since I run my business by referrals, I count on my clients to refer me to people they know who are like them. If I do decide that I want to continue to be their Realtor after the transaction is over and I also would like to work with their friends and family, I put them into my Client Appreciation program. I ask the client to complete an enrollment form at settlement which tells me personal details such as their favorite home design store, sports team, music and birth-date as well as a letter of introduction into the program. Then, once a month, the client will receive an item of value from me which could include information on how much it would cost to do various home improvements or a coupon to their favorite place to shop.

I also do what is called a "pop-by." A pop-by is when I stop by the client's home every few months or so when I am in their area to say "hello" for a few minutes. I like to find out how the home is and if they did anything new to their property. While there, I also answer any real estate questions they may have or see if anyone they know anyone who may be in need of my services. I also call them every other month.

It is vitally important to show clients how much I appreciate and value their business. Since not every client of mine is enrolled in my Client Appreciation program, my clients realize that I personally chose them and that I actually care about them. They were not just simply another transaction. I prove that I am there for any of their real estate needs, always just a phone call away. My clients will not ever forget my name because I am always around.

There are Realtors out there who do not keep in touch with their clients after the sale or only call their clients when business is slow. I think that that gives Realtors a bad name and consumers believe that all Realtors only care about making a buck. Selling real estate is my business but I also do it because I love to help people.

If its been years since you've heard from your Realtor, it is time to find a new Realtor. Don't wait until the last minute when you may not have the proper time to find a good Realtor who will work for you and who meets your expectations. Start calling Realtors or ask your friends if they are still satisfied with their Realtor. If so, give their Realtor a call and have them come out and meet with you. Have a check list of your needs ready.

In a time when good customer service is almost non-existent, isn't knowing that your Realtor is always looking out for you comforting? I don't know any doctor who makes house calls these days or who calls you to see how you are feeling. In fact, I do not know of anyone in any profession right now, who takes time to personally stop by their client's homes while in the area or who calls their clients just to say "hello." Something to think about, right?

If you do not wish to work with the Realtor after your transaction is over for whatever reason, just be honest and tell the Realtor. You wouldn't want the Realtor to keep you on their mailing list or to keep calling you if you were not happy with their services.

If you do remember your Realtor's name but haven't heard from them in a while, why not pick up the phone and give him or her a call. You could have them out to your home to give you an up-to-date home value report and to find out what price homes are selling for in your area. Or you could call just to say "hi" and see if he or she is still there for you.

I love when my clients call me to say "hello." Even Realtors need love.