Tammy Spann

In my fabulous job as a Realtor, I have the opportunity to meet lots of new people. This happens usually from the out of the blue possibilities like sign calls, web advertising, website visits, postcard mailings or other hits from the myriad of advertising that I do. These are first classified as "potential clients" and after a somewhat uneventful courtship of such, they can become actual clients. But on the last several listing appointments I have had the privilege of going to, I have heard alarming comments that make me think, as the old 70's Rod Stewart song so adequately put it, "now hold on a minute, before we go much further." After hearing so many of these and speaking with my fellow Keller Williams agents, I've comprised a list of the five things no Realtor ever wants to hear when they come to list your house. If you're thinking about selling your house soon, be wise and heed the following:

•· I'm not in a big hurry to sell.

Translation: Spend your marketing dollars and time on me and if the deal is perfect, I will sign the papers.

Your Realtor does not make money on a house that does not sell. If you're not in a big hurry to get your house sold, now is probably not the time to list it. The Realtor IS in a big hurry for the house to sale and will spend money marketing it to make that happen. (Funny thing about Realtors; we work on commission and enjoy getting a paycheck.) If you're not serious, please, don't list your house right now.

•·I probably shouldn't tell/show you this but....

Translation: There are some major problems that may come up and bite us on the behind after we get a contract but only if they find them.

I hate this one because right there that shows me the client is not as ethical as I am. Why list the house, spend money marketing it, go through the ordeal of getting a binding contract only to have to wait and pray that the inspector doesn't find a problem that we all know is there? I once had a potential client take me to the basement, show me where mud, water and God know what else leak into the basement but he had put tons of "stuff" in front of it so that it didn't show. His question was whether the inspector would actually move the stuff to see it. Doesn't matter if they do or not......you have to disclose those things. I would rather know about it now than have it kill a deal later.

• I talked with another Realtor who will sell my house at a cheaper commission rate.

Translation: I am a tight wad who doesn't appreciate the time and effort you are going to spend on me.

You have a cheaper Realtor who will work for you in this market where every deal is a potential nightmare with appraisers and lenders and save you maybe a whopping 1%? They're going to work as hard as I do to hold it together? Yeah, right. If you don't value my job and time, you do need to work with someone else. Then call me after your house doesn't sell and you decide you want it done correctly the second time around. I have numerous stories from clients who went with Option A, the cheap Realtor, only to call me to come in, clean up their mess and get the job done. You get what you pay for, people. When you go to buy a Mercedes, you don't visit the GM showroom.

• I really don't want to put any more money into this place.

Translation-Spend your money but not mine.

This one I really don't get and when I hear it, the idiot alarm goes off in my head and I have to make a split second decision...do I really want to work with someone who just doesn't get it?! Usually if you explain to them the why they need to put a little bit more into it, it clicks. But I do have a few, who became someone else problem, that won't budge. Listen, times are tough, budgets are small, and I get that, really. But your home is your biggest financial asset ever and in this market it comes down to two things; a pricing war and a beauty contest. You may have it priced right but if it needs work, you're going to get lowballed. Fix what has to be fixed, update what needs to be updated and reap the $$$ rewards when it sells quickly. As my previously post said, if you price it slightly below market and have it in great shape, you sell quicker and negotiate away less of the sales price.

•Ok, I know they comps say this amount but I want to list it x amount higher (usually a God awfully high number) and just see what happens.

Translation-Yeah, I know you're a Realtor that is a top agent for this area, but I think I really do know more than you do.

In this market, everyone and their brother is looking for a "deal." Who isn't? But listing your house higher than everything else in the neighborhood has only one result-nothing. No one goes to look at an overpriced listing. Then who gets the blame? Does the seller think back and remember badgering the Realtor to list his house, against the advice of said Realtor, for thousands more than anything has ever sold in there? Of course not! It's the Realtors fault that no one came through to look at his overpriced house. I am a knowledgeable, professional and successful agent that knows what will sell and what will not; it's how I make my living. And if I give you a price, I know what I am talking about. Do I wish you could sell for more? Sure, because I make more if you do. But when I give you a price, trust me; I know what I'm saying.

Most Realtors work hard and spend a lot money up front to get your home sold. We want make our living that way. Most of us our honest and hard working and want you to succeed in the sale of your home. Follow these tips above when you talk with a Realtor and you'll do just fine. And if you're thinking about buying or selling, keep Tammy and Team in mind. We would love to help!

When you're in real estate, there are only two ways you can make money. One is working with a buyer, which many times is unproductive and introduces you to a myriad of nut cases who think they are ready, willing and able to purchase a home but many times are not. Often, the reason they can't is just sheer stupidity on their part and then you are left out of time, gasoline and having to move onto another potential client that you hope isn't as bad as the doofus you just finished working with. The other way to make money is by listing homes. This is preferrable to working with buyers in my very humble opinion. Sellers, more often that not, are educated about the market and where things stand. If they're not, you have ample opportunity at the listing appointment to educate and screen them as to whether or not they would be good clients. Now, we all know as Realtors that we work very hard to do that. No one in their right mind wants a high maintenance client with where things stand in the market. New agents may be desperate enough to take whatever they can get but seasoned agents? We're a lot smarter than that. But just case you have one on the fence and you're not sure if you should take the listing or not, here are a few things that may help you out.

You know you shouldn't take that listing if:

1. You pull up in the driveway and notice yellow police tape cordoning off the house.

2. The sidewalk chalk drawings are actually those of bodies and have been drawn by the county coroner.

3. Your sellers ask you to write a special stip that the gleaming silver pole in the middle of the master bedroom and the handcuffs installed just above the headboard of the bed are not to be removed until the night before closing.

4. There is a full frontal nude velvet painting of the owner's wife in the family room for all to see.

5. If it looks as though it is owned by Fred Sanford (and son.)

6.The owner asks you to put in private agent remarks that " Two friendly dogs (Rottweillers) Killer and Bruiser will be kept in the basment during showings and it might be a good idea to not go down there even though they are really sweet animals.

7. The sellers want to overprice by$50,000 "just so we have room to negotiate."

8. The address they give you when you make the listing appointment is 1313 Mockingbird Lane.

9. You ask the seller to walk the property with you and show you the property lines and he says he can't because his ankle monitor the state made him wear will not allow him to go that far from the house.

10. They tell you they're not in a hurry to sell and won't do so unless you bring them a full price offer. At that point, they then want you to consider cutting your commission by a half percent because "you people make too much money anyway," and ask if you can check in with them everyday "even if nothing is going on."

We've all had clients like these and agree that we knew at the beginning we shouldn't have taken that listing! But hey, at least we got some great war stories from it, hhmm?

We seem to have become a nation who enjoys playing the blame game. If something goes wrong in an area of our lives, who can we blame? It can't be ourselves or our decsions. This is especialliy becoming problematic in the already weak and hard hit housing market. Sellers are starting to blame their agents for the fact that their house hasn't sold.

Say it ain't so!

It's not the agent, it's the market!

Now, I am an agent who has had a very successful track record . But the market right now is killing eveyone, more so if you are a seller. In this market, it's the buyers who are calling the shots and they know it. If you are a seller today, know this one thing; you're gonna take a hit. Be prepared for the "low ball ask for everything" offer because that is what you are going to get, plain and simple. Is it fair? No, but that is just where thing are today. Look at it this way; if they low ball you, you are going to take a hit but you're going to make it up on the purchase of your next home.

Sellers are quick to blame the agent but are slow to see that they sometimes are the unwitting accomplice in the big picture. Many are unrealistic about the market and think that although everything else in their subdivision has sold for $200,000 or less, for example, their home is unique and should be listed at 250,000. Right. Or they want to start to high and leave room to negotiate when all they are doing is screwing themselves out of activity by the buyers who really can afford their house. If they start off by overpricing, they are not going to get lookers, let alone offers, and then they spend the rest of the listing period chasing the marke after the y do a price reduction. A lot of sellers did the silly, 100% loan with no money down thing, thereby robbing themselves of any equity and now are upside down with no realistic way out unless they bring cash to the table. Of course, they do not even want to hear about that!

So, is it the market? Yes. Foreclosures are rampant and the media is not helping things by always lamenting how bad it is. Buyers are slow to make decisions because they are afraid they might still be better deals right around the corner and they are taking much longer to decide. Sellers are getting less money for a sales price plus throwing in more items like closing costs, rate buy downs and picky cosmetic repairs just to make the deal work.

Do the agents figure into the eqation at all? Yes they can. There are the agents out there who are just plain lazy who don't return calls or follow up with agents who show the property and yes, that does effect the sellers. If your agent is not providing feedback to you about the what the buyer and showing agent thought about the property they are doing you a huge disservice. A lot of agents now are having to get other jobs because they are no longer making the commissions they used to make and therefore can't give you the attention you deserve. But most agents are dedicated professionals who are hustling and doing whatever they can to try and get a successful, win/win deal to the tabel.

You can help make this happen as a seller by listening to your agent and pricing the property correctly. Declutter, clean, paint, replace carpet and make the curb appeal pop. (Watch HGTV's Designed to Sell for an eye opener about what a little de-clutter can do. Check your local listings; it's worth the 30 minute time investment.) Keep the kid's rooms picked up and work together with your agent to quickly fix whatever negative feedback items you receive from any showings. And don't be afraid to extend an offer to a buyer! I closed one of my biggest sales ever by doing just that!

Just keep in mind that in today's selling environment, it's the market!

Okay, I am writing this because right now I am really steamed. I just had an agent here in Atlanta, Marlene was her name, last name forgotten, who went and showed one of my properties, with no call, hello, request for approval, nothing, nada, zilch. I mean c'mon! In today's market if you a good buyer's agent and showing a house to a potential client, you want to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the house is gonna be in absolutely pristine condition. Apparently she is not a good agent as I received no courtesy call whatsoever from her. I, being the agent supreme who represents the sellers, want to know it is going to show so that i can a), inform my client; b) look like a knowledgable professional; c) want to ensure it it convenient for my client and their schedule; and d) want to be sure my client's house look the best it can and they have enough to notice to make it that way oif for some reason it isn't. Well, Marlene Doofus, the last name that I am assigning her here, did noit give a courtesy call and instead waltzes into the property unannouced. Of course, my sweet little clients had their nephews for the weekend and apparently all their toys as well. Needless to say, I now have a client who wonders why we weren't given a professional heads up on a Saturday morning informing them there was a small entourage of unknown people coming through their completely unannounced.

For those of you wondering, yes, I did call Ms. Doofus who informed me she left a message at our office switchboard. Now excuse me. We have 250+ agents in our office and whenever any message is left we are paged immediatley. No page came. She then said she called a week ago and left the messgae. Hello? Plenty of time there for you to call me on the cell number listed right beside SHOWING INSTRUCTIONS:CALL AGENT and inform me that you are showing my listing. No, I think Marlent Doofus was flying by the seat of her pants and one bad, lazy, inept agent like her takes away from the professional courteous agents who work hard to maintain professionalism.

Long story short, my clients are glad we had a showing, Marlene's clients liked it and may take a second walk through (with a courtesy call this time) and I am pretty sure Marlene got the message to call before showing..especially if I am the listing agent!

Common courtesy...that's all I'm asking!

Okay, I have seen some nasty properties in my real estate career, homes that have been foreclosed on are ususally the worst. I have seen houses trashed because people were pissed they were being thrown out. Once I went to show a house where the former owner had died of breast cancer. Her mom and sister were mad that the girl did not leave the house to them so in return they decided to turn on every faucet upstairs and stop up all the toilets and flush them, leaving behind a nasty, moldy, reeking mess. When I opened the door to the property to show my client, we literally could stand in the foyer, living room, hell, the main floor, and look straight up to the second floor. Every bit of plaster and drywall on the ceiling was totally gone and most of the walls were it had continued to run. What part of the walls that were still there had mold growing all over them. It had even proceeded down to the basement and into all the fiber glass insulation. NASTY!

But yesterday, well, yesterday was a new level like nothing I had ever seen. I have a seller, an investor, who has listed rental property with me. The poor guy had tennants who had completely trashed his property. No, trashed is certainly an understatement. This place was infested with fleas and there were so many roaches in the place that I pulled my hood over my head to keep them from falling off the ceiling into my hair. (Thank God it was raining and I had my windbreaker on.) The smell was deplorable; trash, sweat, filth and chemicals were he had set off four bug bombs already. He had totally stripped the place down to the cement floors and had all the windows open. I can't imagine anyone living this way and doing that to property. What causes someone to live so filthy that they get infested with roaches and fleas?

Needless to say, the place was less then perfect for showing but will be in excellent shape once he makes all the adjustments to it. New floors, new paint, new frame work and moulding replaced. Windows cleaned, baths re-done...it will truly be a showplace at that point.

See, it ain't as glamourous as the TV shows make it look!