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Tanya Nouwens, Real Estate Agent, Montreal

Tales from the Dark Side or "Top Five Ways To (Not) Sell Your Home"

1. Leave that baseball bat beside the master bed during showings.

An excellent idea. Leaves the impression with buyers that this is a dark and dangerous neighbourhood, which is an excellent strategy for drawing offers since everbody loves a little drama in their lives.

2. Leave every single piece of art the children have ever made for you on every flat and vertical surface in the house.

Yup, it shows that your home is full of love, your family's love, your family's things....everywhere. You don't ever want your potential buyer to think that there is 'room' for them in your house. And whatever you do, don't let them start to picture themselves living there. I mean, there isn't even an offer on the table yet!

3. Make sure you updated your home no more recently than 20 years ago.

Everyone knows that anything done 15-20 years ago is much better than anything done recently. Ahhh, those were the good ol' days, no? You updated the kitchen 15 years ago and your draperies cost you a minor mortgage 20 years ago, and those avocado fixtures in the bathroom? You paid a fortune for all of that and they still work fine.

And if your buyer doesn't recognize the value of what you purchased two decades ago, let them change it! Everyone knows how much free time and energy and money people have to put toward renovation and updating the new home they have just moved into, particularly after they have just made a down payment and signed a mortgage.

4. Leave the years of accumulated dust, dirt and pet hair on every surface in your home.

You must never, ever leave the impression that you actually care(d) about how your home looks. If you do, potential buyers might think you took good care of your home and that will only inflate their expectations. Why, they might even think you took care of leaky pipes too! and water in the basement! and moisture in the attic! Now that's just ridiculous...

5. Stalk potential buyers as they traipse through your house during showings.

Potential buyers feel lonely when they have to visit a home without the homeowner to escort them through every square inch of the house. And they certainly don't like feeling like they can speak freely about the pros and cons of this property for them.

Moreover, they feel neglected when they don't get a history lesson from you about how you turned your model-airplane building acumen into a personal mission to DIY every repair to your home, no matter how many tries it took you to get it right.

And be sure to correct buyers if they mention they'd like to tear down the wall separating the kitchen from the dining room. After all, you're the one who has lived in the house for years so YOU clearly know how the next buyer should live in it too.

Good luck!

Tanya Nouwens, Affiliated Real Estate Agent and Certified Canadian Staging Professional (TM), Montreal

JJ Jacobs Realty Inc. & Ready, Set...Sold!, Montreal, Canada

www.jjjrealty.com www.readysetsold.ca

Getting the Balance Right?

How do you know when your work/self balance is OK or when it's out of whack? I recently discovered that the state of my work/self balance is reflected in the state of my toenails -- more specifically, whether they're painted or not. And more specific than that, whether the nail polish is relatively fresh (anything under a month old is good for me), contains less chips than I have toes, and is in a colour that has been seen in some salon or pharmacy, somewhere, in the last decade.

And so yesterday, when I found the time to paint my toenails -- and no, one coat does not count -- AND to let them dry before I shoved my feet into some high heels and clicked off to an appointment, I realized all's well, at least for the moment, in the work/self balance of Tanya's universe.

Yup, if I can find 10 minutes to do something for myself, that makes me feel a wee bit prettier than I did 10 minutes ago and that makes me feel like someone is taking care of me, I'm feeling pretty good, all things considered. (Of course, the fact that I only need 10 minutes of attention to feel like I'm being cared for is the subject of another blog...and long discussions with my therapist :)

What about you? How do you know when you've got the balance right?